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New here - 8yo son's anxiety exhausting
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<blockquote data-quote="YoyoMama" data-source="post: 234615" data-attributes="member: 6659"><p>Marguerite - thank you for the reply. The chart and list will not work for us in the mornings but could certainly work in the afternoons and evenings. I hope that the new school will provide enough of a relief from anxiety that he will sleep better (first 2 days he is getting in bed and falling asleep in contrast to staying awake for 2-3 hours) and get up early enough to get some things done. Right now, I am waking him, getting him dressed and down to breakfast. Sitting with him while he eats, monitoring his eating and taking medicine (3 times this past year he did not take his medicine and it created a HUGE disastor for himself at school) and then overseeing his tooth and hair brushing plus coat, backpack and lunch box. If I am not dressed before I get him up a disaster ensues.</p><p> </p><p>In fact one of the biggest difficulties in raising him has been that if he is left alone, unsupervised, even for a moment then he creates such a huge mess that it will take me 30-60 minutes to clean up. </p><p> </p><p>While I do know that angry responses make matters worse it is none-the-less very difficult at times to not respond when a huge mess is created in the brief 90 seconds it took me to go to the bathroom while he finished his breakfast.</p><p> </p><p>Anyway. I like the idea of giving him a list to follow but I don't think we are there yet. He has a job list from karate and we are not getting that done at all ever since I turned the responsibility over to him. When I had the responsibility of doing filling it out it got done. Even though he likes karate and the encouragement he gets when these weekly job sheets are turned in yet he hasn't turned one in for 3 months and will not be eligible to test until he starts turning them in. My point is that he doesn't seem capable of doing this on his own - ie even when I remind him daily that he needs to check off his actions daily.</p><p> </p><p>Do other parents here find that they are doing "too much" for their difficult children or need to be present to guide their difficult children step by step? It is quite an odd issue, especially as I have noone else to help with his oversight.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="YoyoMama, post: 234615, member: 6659"] Marguerite - thank you for the reply. The chart and list will not work for us in the mornings but could certainly work in the afternoons and evenings. I hope that the new school will provide enough of a relief from anxiety that he will sleep better (first 2 days he is getting in bed and falling asleep in contrast to staying awake for 2-3 hours) and get up early enough to get some things done. Right now, I am waking him, getting him dressed and down to breakfast. Sitting with him while he eats, monitoring his eating and taking medicine (3 times this past year he did not take his medicine and it created a HUGE disastor for himself at school) and then overseeing his tooth and hair brushing plus coat, backpack and lunch box. If I am not dressed before I get him up a disaster ensues. In fact one of the biggest difficulties in raising him has been that if he is left alone, unsupervised, even for a moment then he creates such a huge mess that it will take me 30-60 minutes to clean up. While I do know that angry responses make matters worse it is none-the-less very difficult at times to not respond when a huge mess is created in the brief 90 seconds it took me to go to the bathroom while he finished his breakfast. Anyway. I like the idea of giving him a list to follow but I don't think we are there yet. He has a job list from karate and we are not getting that done at all ever since I turned the responsibility over to him. When I had the responsibility of doing filling it out it got done. Even though he likes karate and the encouragement he gets when these weekly job sheets are turned in yet he hasn't turned one in for 3 months and will not be eligible to test until he starts turning them in. My point is that he doesn't seem capable of doing this on his own - ie even when I remind him daily that he needs to check off his actions daily. Do other parents here find that they are doing "too much" for their difficult children or need to be present to guide their difficult children step by step? It is quite an odd issue, especially as I have noone else to help with his oversight. [/QUOTE]
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