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New here - 8yo son's anxiety exhausting
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<blockquote data-quote="ML" data-source="post: 234692"><p>Welcome! Yes, I understand perfectly. My son "manster" has similar issues. Some things that have helped are: sructure, routine and flexibility. I tend to be a neat nick and when my environment is out of order it goes against my serenity. I have learned to allow chaos in certain parts of the home that I can shut out of my area of vision to be dealt with when I have time. husband is also one who is a destroyer of homes lol.</p><p></p><p>The lists tend to help us more at night as well. I tend to let son sleep as late as possible because he's often gotten to sleep too late and I want him to have those extra minutes. We're working on earlier bedtime. So we scurry to get to school on time. When the weather is bad like it was this week, forgetaboutiit.</p><p></p><p>I understand the exhaustion. Do you have any supports, friends, family perhaps? If you can get even one night a week to yourself it can help. I know how hard it is when you have to supervise them 24/7 been there done that. Manster is a couple of years older than your difficult child and I will say that in those 2 years from 8-10 he has come a long way. Another thing that has helped, and I'm not proud of this and it isn't a good thing for difficult child, is that his computer games have given me some space, an hour here and there that he has no "need" for me. My goal is to decrease that need and encourage more independence.</p><p></p><p>Does your son have friends? Mine would NEVER go over to a friend's house (too much anxiety) but was happy for them to come here. I just confine them to those areas of the house I can shut off (his room) and get stuff done. </p><p></p><p>Also, I am married (not to difficult child dad) but husband isn't invovled with discipline, homework, making dinners, etc. so I often say I am a married single mother. It is hard.</p><p></p><p>This board has helped so much. There are tons of suggestions, things that have worked for others and a spirit of friendship that I know you will find helpful.</p><p></p><p>Glad you found us.</p><p></p><p>ML</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="ML, post: 234692"] Welcome! Yes, I understand perfectly. My son "manster" has similar issues. Some things that have helped are: sructure, routine and flexibility. I tend to be a neat nick and when my environment is out of order it goes against my serenity. I have learned to allow chaos in certain parts of the home that I can shut out of my area of vision to be dealt with when I have time. husband is also one who is a destroyer of homes lol. The lists tend to help us more at night as well. I tend to let son sleep as late as possible because he's often gotten to sleep too late and I want him to have those extra minutes. We're working on earlier bedtime. So we scurry to get to school on time. When the weather is bad like it was this week, forgetaboutiit. I understand the exhaustion. Do you have any supports, friends, family perhaps? If you can get even one night a week to yourself it can help. I know how hard it is when you have to supervise them 24/7 been there done that. Manster is a couple of years older than your difficult child and I will say that in those 2 years from 8-10 he has come a long way. Another thing that has helped, and I'm not proud of this and it isn't a good thing for difficult child, is that his computer games have given me some space, an hour here and there that he has no "need" for me. My goal is to decrease that need and encourage more independence. Does your son have friends? Mine would NEVER go over to a friend's house (too much anxiety) but was happy for them to come here. I just confine them to those areas of the house I can shut off (his room) and get stuff done. Also, I am married (not to difficult child dad) but husband isn't invovled with discipline, homework, making dinners, etc. so I often say I am a married single mother. It is hard. This board has helped so much. There are tons of suggestions, things that have worked for others and a spirit of friendship that I know you will find helpful. Glad you found us. ML [/QUOTE]
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