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<blockquote data-quote="DDD" data-source="post: 116239" data-attributes="member: 35"><p>Chances are I am the one that can relate to your pain most as my</p><p>daughter is a CO who "fell in love" with a prisoner and secretly</p><p>arranged for him to take a train after his discharge and come to</p><p>our city...to move into her house...and babysit her younger son</p><p>who was in elementary school!! My husband and I had bought "her" house so that she would have a stable home for her two sons. We</p><p>spent our limited retirement funds for that purchase and since</p><p>she made an adequate salary, we convinced ourselves that she would pay the mortgage etc. etc. It was suppose to be a win/win.</p><p></p><p>She "hid" him from all the family. After not hearing a word from</p><p>her or difficult child for a couple of weeks my radar began to screach! I</p><p>sent a relative to the house for an unexpected visit and he told</p><p>me "I would bet the farm that the guy at the house is a convict".</p><p>Even though GFGmom has been impulsive all her life, I truly was</p><p>shocked beyond belief. Then it turns out he was in prison for</p><p>an alleged sexual assault (his brothers girlfriend) the whole</p><p>family was alarmed.</p><p></p><p>After three years he hooked up with a new girlfriend who was also a Puerto Rican. What did GFGmom do?? She decided "to prove to that girlfriend that SHE was the love of his life" so she got pregnant.</p><p>Taught him!</p><p></p><p>We had to spend $$'s to clean up the house enough to sell it. We</p><p>had to threaten to turn her into her bosses if she did not sign</p><p>her deed interest over to us. The little girl is almost six.</p><p>The biodad will be released from prison this summer (he was put</p><p>back in prison for not notifying officials of his change of address which is required for all sexual offenders in Florida).</p><p>GFGmom is still making choices on impulse. Although she doesn't</p><p>"love" the biodad, she will be receptive to the money he will be</p><p>prepared to give her for "their" daughter in exchange for the right to bond with the daughter.</p><p></p><p>Does my story help you at all????? NOPE</p><p>Do I have any answer that will help you???? NOPE</p><p>Do I have any advice?? YES</p><p></p><p>Study the missive on detachment. Get out of the loop at any cost</p><p>right now. If you have to forget your Mom, too...then do it. I</p><p>am an extremely strong, experienced parent. Once adult children</p><p>make a series of BAD choices like your daughter and mine, there</p><p>is no reason to think you can help or change them. Eventually</p><p>if she "wakes up", you will be the one she knows loves her and</p><p>she will contact you for help.</p><p></p><p>Sending sincere caring thoughts your way. DDD</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DDD, post: 116239, member: 35"] Chances are I am the one that can relate to your pain most as my daughter is a CO who "fell in love" with a prisoner and secretly arranged for him to take a train after his discharge and come to our city...to move into her house...and babysit her younger son who was in elementary school!! My husband and I had bought "her" house so that she would have a stable home for her two sons. We spent our limited retirement funds for that purchase and since she made an adequate salary, we convinced ourselves that she would pay the mortgage etc. etc. It was suppose to be a win/win. She "hid" him from all the family. After not hearing a word from her or difficult child for a couple of weeks my radar began to screach! I sent a relative to the house for an unexpected visit and he told me "I would bet the farm that the guy at the house is a convict". Even though GFGmom has been impulsive all her life, I truly was shocked beyond belief. Then it turns out he was in prison for an alleged sexual assault (his brothers girlfriend) the whole family was alarmed. After three years he hooked up with a new girlfriend who was also a Puerto Rican. What did GFGmom do?? She decided "to prove to that girlfriend that SHE was the love of his life" so she got pregnant. Taught him! We had to spend $$'s to clean up the house enough to sell it. We had to threaten to turn her into her bosses if she did not sign her deed interest over to us. The little girl is almost six. The biodad will be released from prison this summer (he was put back in prison for not notifying officials of his change of address which is required for all sexual offenders in Florida). GFGmom is still making choices on impulse. Although she doesn't "love" the biodad, she will be receptive to the money he will be prepared to give her for "their" daughter in exchange for the right to bond with the daughter. Does my story help you at all????? NOPE Do I have any answer that will help you???? NOPE Do I have any advice?? YES Study the missive on detachment. Get out of the loop at any cost right now. If you have to forget your Mom, too...then do it. I am an extremely strong, experienced parent. Once adult children make a series of BAD choices like your daughter and mine, there is no reason to think you can help or change them. Eventually if she "wakes up", you will be the one she knows loves her and she will contact you for help. Sending sincere caring thoughts your way. DDD [/QUOTE]
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