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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 741646" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>Good.</p><p>The painful thing for your husband is this: <em>It is no longer his call whether or not stepson receives consequences. He no longer has a say. What he thinks does not get factored in.</em> Your stepson by his behavior has engaged with "society" in that for the kinds of things he is doing, there are consequences beyond school, beyond home. These are called laws. I am not being sarcastic or cynical here. I am feeling empathy.</p><p></p><p>I wish I knew how you could help your husband. Because he is struggling to feel control, when he really has none. He will suffer as long as he feels he can or should be able to control the situation which is spiraling beyond anybody's ability to control it.</p><p></p><p>I guess all of us feel this way. But I feel for your husband.</p><p></p><p>Thank goodness you have in this framework you put in place: the diagnosis, the therapy, the contacts, all of what you have done in these months. Without it there would be a worse crisis. Now it is to respond. There are no more choices now. It is only to recognize what is. I am so sorry.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 741646, member: 18958"] Good. The painful thing for your husband is this: [I]It is no longer his call whether or not stepson receives consequences. He no longer has a say. What he thinks does not get factored in.[/I] Your stepson by his behavior has engaged with "society" in that for the kinds of things he is doing, there are consequences beyond school, beyond home. These are called laws. I am not being sarcastic or cynical here. I am feeling empathy. I wish I knew how you could help your husband. Because he is struggling to feel control, when he really has none. He will suffer as long as he feels he can or should be able to control the situation which is spiraling beyond anybody's ability to control it. I guess all of us feel this way. But I feel for your husband. Thank goodness you have in this framework you put in place: the diagnosis, the therapy, the contacts, all of what you have done in these months. Without it there would be a worse crisis. Now it is to respond. There are no more choices now. It is only to recognize what is. I am so sorry. [/QUOTE]
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