new plan with difficult child

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Jena, Mar 4, 2011.

  1. Jena

    Jena New Member


    i met with the new therapist today. he worked with difficult child alot on how her brain works. main going from events that take place to thoughts than distorted than action.

    so she has an assignment each day which is to work on changing how her brain works. this therapy is intense i will say that. even when we arent' there she'll have a notebook and she has to find several moments in the day where she is faced with fear an anxiety situation. than she has to stop think and think of two other ways that she can "perceive the situation.

    its' alot more involved than that yet it's a daily work thing. he also said she should not be in school until september. he said i have alot of work to do with her and throwing school in and varying situations will work against me and her work.

    he's writing a letter and im picking up thursday on next appointment. so she'll be home with me throughout year and into summer.

    he and i agreed inclusion is way to go for her, the current school doesnt' have that model so we're assuming moving into a district that does is the way to go.

    also he thinks a medication change should occur. he's got a phd yet he said i'm not a psychiatric yet i feel the medications are wrong.

    i think she should be on a mood stabilizer and than slowly work in an ssri. he said ssri's are basically non obsessional medications besides depression lifting. he said she obsesses all the time. if she's truly bipolar he said she'll fly on the ssri. i said she does. he said well than mood stabilizer first than add in the ssri so that it'll work and do its job for her.

    he said he also feels she's got some spectrum stuff like asperger's her need to have things exact etc. he doesnt' feel it's just her Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD). he feels theres alot going on with her. yet he also did say shes' brilliant and i think i can work with her. she changes in a heartbeat from morbid to totally workable.

    he isnt' convinced of the bipolar yet. he said that could be compensatory from the anxiety. he said yet i know i can fix her i just know it and than when our work's done we'll see what we're left with.

    hes' super confident i like this guy. yet it's alot of work. we left and already faced 3 situations where i had to work with her on the perception and come up with diff choices.

    what do we all think???? medication combo makes me very nervous
  2. HaoZi

    HaoZi Guest

    The medications is something he can discuss with the prescribing doctor. Sounds like the other stuff is working!
  3. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    I would let the psychiatrist figure out the medications.

    I'm a cynic. I don't believe any one professional can fix anybody. I believe it has to come form the person and that different methods work for different people (are we ever REALLY fixed or do we learn to cope better???) I think his plan is worth trying. I also think that getting ones hopes up TOO high is not wise. Usually a psychiatric patient needs a team of doctors working together. I did find CBT very helpful. It didn't cure me though and I often do slip into my old thinking ways. But I'm more able to try to correct my thinking errors.

    I've been in treatment now for thirty years. I think it is an ongoing process. JMO, and it sounds like you have a good plan in place for now (minus the medications...let the psychiatrist do that)
  4. svengandhi

    svengandhi Well-Known Member

    Is this the DBT person? I keep wanting to try DBT with difficult child...

    Whatever it is, it sounds like it's off to a promising start.
  5. Jena

    Jena New Member

    Midwest mom hi, i am just hopeful and for the first time in a long time feeling like we're actually doing something besides talking about his endless diagnosis and medicating her. we've done pyschotherapy for years, tried feeback therapy, relaxation etc. nothing worked. yet this guy is so vibrant and confident yet not too much if you know what i mean. he's confident, highly knowledgable and already has put her and i on task.

    i like that. i also like that difficult child met the challenge already today at library. saw two girls from school for the first time and almost panicked. they walked right by us and yes they did look at her. we got to 2nd level of library adn she was wrenching hands etc (typical) and she said see right there i thought their talking about me, i can hear them they think i'm weird. yet maybe it's just that they looked at me because i'm pretty and they havent' seen me in 7 mos and are shocked. YAY i thought this could work!

    we shall see time will tell. yet i'm giong to work real hard and so is she.

    sven yes it's the new cbt guy. he's costing alot yet today put me on sliding scale fee. even talked bout her little boy who has asperger's a bit with difficult child. i do think this is worth a shot, i like his attitude that he doesn't want anyone messing with her work by throwing her back into the fire at school until she has the tools to handle it. it makes sense to me his approach it's lengthy and it's common sense retraining that little brain of hers. wish id' found him 6 years ago!

    we shall see only time will tell. yet the medications do make me nervous. he watns to be in constant contact with-pysch doctor yet the guy i currently have is well not so graet. i do most investigating on medications go to him and he writes script not a good thing. so the new guy has a lunch thing with a great pysch doctor who he said costs a fortune yet he's going to tell her about difficult child and see if she has links to pysch doctor that takes our insurance. he's willing to work for us and that's what i like.
  6. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    this sounds like a great therapist- the type I tried very hard to find for my son. I wouldn't have a problem with him being in contact with psychiatrist, especially since he sounds more in touch with your daughter's issues than psychiatrist does. And he's correct about the BiPolar (BP) medications. SSRIs can cause bad reactionos in some people whether they are BiPolar (BP) or not.
  7. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    Here's hoping you can find an equally qualified Psychiatrist who will work together with your new therapist. It really takes a team effort to resolve such complex issues. Hugs DDD
  8. smallworld

    smallworld Moderator

    I would caution you about removing the Zyprexa too soon. True, it may not be the right medication to fix all her issues, but discontinuing it too quickly may cause the eating issues to flood back. My own very complicated daughter (who has obsessional anxiety issues) requires a mood stabilizer (Lamictal), an antidepressant (Remeron -- we went with a non-SSRI because all my kids become unglued on SSRIs) plus Zyprexa to achieve stability. I agree with the others that you need to find a very competent psychiatrist to manage your daughter's medications.

    Good luck!
  9. Jena

    Jena New Member

    hi thanks guys!!! :)

    haozi - yes i am totally going to go with-a doctor on medications, yet you know me i'll want to know what it is the risks, etc. the basic stuff.

    klmno - i wish you had found someone like this. i am trying to not get too excited. i'm hopeful. i can't explain this guy to you in words. he's totally down to earth yet knows his stuff inside and out and it's all just very basic stuff. yet he seems to have a real grasp on it all. and he seems to "get" her. knowone has ever been able to. as far as the medications go yea i know. i gotta work thru my fear with the mood stabilizer.

    ddd - keeping my fingers crossed. gotta tell you in the years i've been handling her "stuff" i've never felt as though i was getting anywhere. as many of us you feel as though you have your feet in the sand and your going nowhere just passing time, getting by etc.

    small - i know i feel it too. yet i can't let fear hold me back now. its going to be a while till we get a new pysch doctor on board anyway. i've already gone against portland hospital's advice and titrate down schedule on the zyprexa and kept her on longer. part of the problem with the zyprexa is it isnt' really making a huge hit on the anxiety anymore. her bodies so adjusted to the 10mg i have her on. iv'e gone down to 7.5 now for a week. also with difficult child she responds to ap's oddly when it comes to weight. it doesnt' evenly distribute it goes right to her belly.

    so after being malnourished and down to like 80something pounds at her height, now her stomachs totally swollen. it's out there. for me i dont' care. i'm still smiling while she eats. yet for her it's adding to the already depressed her and tha'Tourette's Syndrome not good the doctor agrees. also we dont' want her swinging other way into another eating disorder due to the swollen belly if you know what i mean. she's been complaining about it for weeks now. i'm ugly i'm fat, etc. i said your healthy and beautiful. she said mom my stomach looks like husband's lol. i said sit ups difficult child sit ups. i taught her yet u know her shes' too thick headed to do anything. another thing doctor picked up on is her large "avoidance" issues which we're in a circular motion of it all and it only makes her issues worse.

    i told the doctor yesterday i hope you know i'm expecting alot from you, i hope your everything you claim to be, so far i think your great, yet alot's riding on you and this type of therapy you claim will truly relieve her of alot of suffering she's been in.

    i think actually it's the perfect time for this, age 12 hormone's raging what better time now with her intelligence level also peeking to introduce such an abstract and multi layered thought process of changing her thoughts.....

    her'es hoping i have to say this has improved my mood. if she can get 5% of relief or difference i'll be thrilled. been too many years with no good answers and way too many problems. she wakes up each day covered in urine even though we're using pull ups that alone can set her mood for the day.
  10. HaoZi

    HaoZi Guest

    We had the same issue.
  11. smallworld

    smallworld Moderator

    Jen, we had the same issue. But after a year on Zyprexa my daughter grew and her weight more evenly distributed. She's been on Zyprexa for 4 years now, and you can't tell it by her belly any longer.
  12. Jena

    Jena New Member

    i remember you telling me. yet this doctor doesn't think it's doing the trick. so he's advising to change it. also difficult child's 5'5" i'm not sure how much more growing she'll be doing lol