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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 675848" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>Colleen, I wanted to say "hi" today. I have not had time to read through most of the posts but did read your history of the issues with your son.</p><p></p><p>This is what I think: This is a situation where there is really a right or wrong thing to do. It is a black and white situation and every aspect has to be confronted without ambiguity.</p><p></p><p>You cannot compromise yourself. Because if you do, you compromise your son, and your other son.</p><p></p><p>By letting a small thing go, it tells your son that you are confused...that there are shades of gray...that there can be aspects of his situation that can be tolerated.</p><p></p><p>This is what I think now: There is no part of illegal or self-destructive behavior that can be tolerated.</p><p>You are compromising yourself here, your safety and your integrity. This can never be a good thing. You know what you must do. I think you do.</p><p></p><p>This can never be good for your son. That is what I think.</p><p></p><p>He is a smart person. A good person. He can understand, if you tell him the truth.</p><p>The situation you are putting yourself in if you look the other way. Your obligation to do the right thing. For him. For yourself. For your job. It is a matter of integrity and responsibility, I think. To tell them the truth. To tell ourselves the truth.</p><p></p><p>That is how we get through this. By telling ourselves the truth. By letting in the truth. We see we are strong enough to bear it. We see ourselves being strong people. And with this, we grow stronger.</p><p></p><p>You are doing this. We are changing, all of us, in what we see as our role as mothers. You are strong. Stronger than you think. We are with you. You are not alone with this.</p><p></p><p>COPA</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 675848, member: 18958"] Colleen, I wanted to say "hi" today. I have not had time to read through most of the posts but did read your history of the issues with your son. This is what I think: This is a situation where there is really a right or wrong thing to do. It is a black and white situation and every aspect has to be confronted without ambiguity. You cannot compromise yourself. Because if you do, you compromise your son, and your other son. By letting a small thing go, it tells your son that you are confused...that there are shades of gray...that there can be aspects of his situation that can be tolerated. This is what I think now: There is no part of illegal or self-destructive behavior that can be tolerated. You are compromising yourself here, your safety and your integrity. This can never be a good thing. You know what you must do. I think you do. This can never be good for your son. That is what I think. He is a smart person. A good person. He can understand, if you tell him the truth. The situation you are putting yourself in if you look the other way. Your obligation to do the right thing. For him. For yourself. For your job. It is a matter of integrity and responsibility, I think. To tell them the truth. To tell ourselves the truth. That is how we get through this. By telling ourselves the truth. By letting in the truth. We see we are strong enough to bear it. We see ourselves being strong people. And with this, we grow stronger. You are doing this. We are changing, all of us, in what we see as our role as mothers. You are strong. Stronger than you think. We are with you. You are not alone with this. COPA [/QUOTE]
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