It's 4am, and I am awake like most nights. My story may not sound unique but it's the last thing I imagined for my sweet, smart and kind boy. My oldest son is twenty one and I've just picked together that he is now dealing drugs. He graduated top of his class with plans to do all kinds of wonderful things.... Fast forward three years and he has quit university three times. It's been a rough road with a time in there we now know he was dealing with addiction. We are an upper middle class professional family, with our younger son in his first year of university. None of this makes sense to me. We have given our son so much, and he has always been kind and respectful. We both work very hard, and have always expected much from our sons. I work as a school guidance counsellor and part time at a youth shelter, so I see the destruction first hand of drugs. It's killing me inside. I am not the same happy person I used to be. I am avoiding friends and social events. I'm scared for my husband who is ready to kick our son out. We are away right now for Xmas and all I can think about is next week when we return home. If he leaves he will be a drug dealer for sure. How do I kick out my own son. I just don't know if I can do it. But I know I have to. I'm beyond heartbroken.