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<blockquote data-quote="Rosie67" data-source="post: 675893" data-attributes="member: 19775"><p>Oh Colleen, I am so sorry to read your story. It seems we have all travelled similar situations. I remember reading an article about how parents enable the behaviours displayed by our children, well mine anyway. I have spent soooo long trying to minimise the problems, pay off any debts, hide the problem from our family, even turning a blind eye etc etc. This became exhausting, distressing and things did not get any better. Then I read an analogy of what I was doing ....."My child was standing on train tracks with a train approaching her fast, the horns and lights were flashing madly to get off. Just as she is about to get hit I throw myself in front of her, pushing her off the tracks and get myself totally smashed. She is perfectly fine and the next day she returns to the same tracks, waiting again for that train. Again I come hobbling along and repeat the same actions'. This is what i do. We save and save and save until one day we realise that we are helping them to do exactly what they want to do. I know it is such a difficult time and I am waiting to exhale after a rotten Christmas period. But I am off those tracks, my health, my happiness and heart can't take being run over by the another train.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Rosie67, post: 675893, member: 19775"] Oh Colleen, I am so sorry to read your story. It seems we have all travelled similar situations. I remember reading an article about how parents enable the behaviours displayed by our children, well mine anyway. I have spent soooo long trying to minimise the problems, pay off any debts, hide the problem from our family, even turning a blind eye etc etc. This became exhausting, distressing and things did not get any better. Then I read an analogy of what I was doing ....."My child was standing on train tracks with a train approaching her fast, the horns and lights were flashing madly to get off. Just as she is about to get hit I throw myself in front of her, pushing her off the tracks and get myself totally smashed. She is perfectly fine and the next day she returns to the same tracks, waiting again for that train. Again I come hobbling along and repeat the same actions'. This is what i do. We save and save and save until one day we realise that we are helping them to do exactly what they want to do. I know it is such a difficult time and I am waiting to exhale after a rotten Christmas period. But I am off those tracks, my health, my happiness and heart can't take being run over by the another train. [/QUOTE]
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