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Substance Abuse
Newbie learning to deal with ODD...help!
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 180694" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>We fostered. These kids have problems WAY beyond normal teen angst. Most have been shuffled around from birth and come from pretty bad families. Some were exposed to drugs in utero. You can't possibly know why the child acts like she does, and (hate to say it) but we adopted two boys who were so dangerous--and the social workers hadn't a clue about this. The information your parents get is limited, at best, and the evaluations these kids get are faulty. The system constantly fails these kids.</p><p>Sounds like Mom and Dad aren't adopting her. Their job is to try to keep her stable while she is with them. She has no stable background to back up her past--nothing to ground her--and love does not fix all. We thought it did too, but some kids can not stand to be loved as it is so uncomfortable for them--they have something called Reactive Attachment Disorder. </p><p>This child is not going to behave like a child who has had a normal upbringing. She probably will not be reasonable. She has been through a lot more than most children and will be unlikely to respond to you normally. You may want to google up "Attachment Disorders." She likely has some serious attachment issues, and that makes her relationships with others very hard for herself and everyone else. If this is your parents first foster child, she's easy. The ones we got at first were VERY violent! Good luck.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 180694, member: 1550"] We fostered. These kids have problems WAY beyond normal teen angst. Most have been shuffled around from birth and come from pretty bad families. Some were exposed to drugs in utero. You can't possibly know why the child acts like she does, and (hate to say it) but we adopted two boys who were so dangerous--and the social workers hadn't a clue about this. The information your parents get is limited, at best, and the evaluations these kids get are faulty. The system constantly fails these kids. Sounds like Mom and Dad aren't adopting her. Their job is to try to keep her stable while she is with them. She has no stable background to back up her past--nothing to ground her--and love does not fix all. We thought it did too, but some kids can not stand to be loved as it is so uncomfortable for them--they have something called Reactive Attachment Disorder. This child is not going to behave like a child who has had a normal upbringing. She probably will not be reasonable. She has been through a lot more than most children and will be unlikely to respond to you normally. You may want to google up "Attachment Disorders." She likely has some serious attachment issues, and that makes her relationships with others very hard for herself and everyone else. If this is your parents first foster child, she's easy. The ones we got at first were VERY violent! Good luck. [/QUOTE]
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