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Parent Emeritus
no good deed goes unpunished
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<blockquote data-quote="elizabrary" data-source="post: 481579" data-attributes="member: 11235"><p>I think we are programmed as moms to believe we always have to be there for our kids NO MATTER WHAT. It's just not true, but I have struggled with this myself. When I start thinking my daughter is acting nuts and wondering what I should do about it, if I should put up with it or not, I ask myself one simple question- would I accept this treatment from anyone else? The answer is nearly always no, so I do what I would do with anyone else, which is walk away, hang up the phone and don't answer it when she calls back 12 times in a row, whatever. Sometimes with Kat I have to cut myself off completely from her for a period of time, which is hard because of my granddaughter, but for my own sanity and well-being I cannot have contact with her. She really hates that, but usually gives up after a couple of days. Then in one or two weeks or months she re-establishes contact and is nice and pleasant for awhile, until she loses it again and... But we have to remember that as mothers that does not mean we have to tolerate abusive behavior in any form. Sorry you are going through this. I know how awful it is.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="elizabrary, post: 481579, member: 11235"] I think we are programmed as moms to believe we always have to be there for our kids NO MATTER WHAT. It's just not true, but I have struggled with this myself. When I start thinking my daughter is acting nuts and wondering what I should do about it, if I should put up with it or not, I ask myself one simple question- would I accept this treatment from anyone else? The answer is nearly always no, so I do what I would do with anyone else, which is walk away, hang up the phone and don't answer it when she calls back 12 times in a row, whatever. Sometimes with Kat I have to cut myself off completely from her for a period of time, which is hard because of my granddaughter, but for my own sanity and well-being I cannot have contact with her. She really hates that, but usually gives up after a couple of days. Then in one or two weeks or months she re-establishes contact and is nice and pleasant for awhile, until she loses it again and... But we have to remember that as mothers that does not mean we have to tolerate abusive behavior in any form. Sorry you are going through this. I know how awful it is. [/QUOTE]
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