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Not coping well, missing my difficult child and heartsick that he doesn't care.
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<blockquote data-quote="Hound dog" data-source="post: 472217" data-attributes="member: 84"><p>Shifting those gears from how we took care of them as kids ect can be one of the toughest things for a parent to do even if it's a easy child. But it's one we have to do, otherwise we risk smothering them. Odds are difficult child is enjoying his new adult freedom. He probably isn't thinking a whole lot on Oh, I need to check in with Mom, because as an adult? he really doesn't need to check in with Mom.....although it would be considerate if he did so from time to time. </p><p></p><p>When Travis went off to college I worried sick for various reasons, his disabilities were the major cause. Did I call him all the time? No. Did I want to? Oh heck yeah. He didn't contact me hardly at all during that year. (we talked more when he came home for holidays) When he did contact me they were short but nice conversations. I didn't push it because one of his goals for that year was independent living. </p><p></p><p>My girls when they moved out were the opposite........I saw them more once they left than I ever did while they were home. lol (girls are different usually) </p><p></p><p>That your difficult child called you a couple of weeks ago to talk is a good sign. That he called because easy child contacted him telling him you needed to hear from him is also a good sign. If he didn't care about you, trust me, you wouldn't have gotten that call. </p><p></p><p>If you two were really close before, odds are you'll be somewhat close again in the future. The adjective changed because males do tend to hang around their girlfriend's or wives families more than their own.....mostly because the girlfriend / wife does. </p><p></p><p>Try not to let it get to you. Give him some real time to miss you. And while you do, find something new to interest you and help you shift those gears. Pick up an old hobby or find a new one ect.</p><p></p><p>((hugs))</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Hound dog, post: 472217, member: 84"] Shifting those gears from how we took care of them as kids ect can be one of the toughest things for a parent to do even if it's a easy child. But it's one we have to do, otherwise we risk smothering them. Odds are difficult child is enjoying his new adult freedom. He probably isn't thinking a whole lot on Oh, I need to check in with Mom, because as an adult? he really doesn't need to check in with Mom.....although it would be considerate if he did so from time to time. When Travis went off to college I worried sick for various reasons, his disabilities were the major cause. Did I call him all the time? No. Did I want to? Oh heck yeah. He didn't contact me hardly at all during that year. (we talked more when he came home for holidays) When he did contact me they were short but nice conversations. I didn't push it because one of his goals for that year was independent living. My girls when they moved out were the opposite........I saw them more once they left than I ever did while they were home. lol (girls are different usually) That your difficult child called you a couple of weeks ago to talk is a good sign. That he called because easy child contacted him telling him you needed to hear from him is also a good sign. If he didn't care about you, trust me, you wouldn't have gotten that call. If you two were really close before, odds are you'll be somewhat close again in the future. The adjective changed because males do tend to hang around their girlfriend's or wives families more than their own.....mostly because the girlfriend / wife does. Try not to let it get to you. Give him some real time to miss you. And while you do, find something new to interest you and help you shift those gears. Pick up an old hobby or find a new one ect. ((hugs)) [/QUOTE]
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Not coping well, missing my difficult child and heartsick that he doesn't care.
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