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<blockquote data-quote="Smithmom" data-source="post: 740983" data-attributes="member: 23371"><p>I don't know you or your son. This is only my own experience, not advice. </p><p></p><p>Your description of his current life gave me a flashback. I was in my late 20s turning 30. I lived alone. I had undx severe depression. Everything looked black despite a good career, good income, owned my house, had friends, future. What I desperately wanted, more than the perfect boyfriend even, was someone to sit with me 24/7. A dead relationship with boyfriend I didn't really love had just ended. Missed his kids far more than I missed him. Didn't want my mother, but mine was useless in relationships. Just a friend. Didn't want to be alone. The darkness at night scared me. Being alone scared me. I wanted to talk to someone, in person or by phone 24/7. I went to work every day. Lost weight, thinnest time in my life, cause I just wasn't interested in food. Wasn't interested in anything really. What changed all this? I attempted suicide. My intention was serious. The execution poor. I lived. I got medications. I set my life in a slightly different direction. Thought about what I really wanted, what made me happy/ smile. Set a plan to get those things and get rid of the things that weren't making me happy. It wasn't an overnight overhaul. It was a new direction. But it was the combo of medications (old ones not SSRIs) and new look at life that did it. Got a dog. Became a foster parent. Gave my 3 mo notice at work. </p><p></p><p>Many years later now. I know the signs of depression. Have never been that bad again. Pay much more attention to making myself happy today... Not biding time waiting for Mr. Right. My happiness comes from within.. Not from a partner. I have my fair share of nasty childhood history, bad habits, etc. Over the years I've had therapy for various reasons not the least of which was my gift from God. Therapy has been great. But back then it was freeing myself from what my family and society said I should do and be. Being me.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Smithmom, post: 740983, member: 23371"] I don't know you or your son. This is only my own experience, not advice. Your description of his current life gave me a flashback. I was in my late 20s turning 30. I lived alone. I had undx severe depression. Everything looked black despite a good career, good income, owned my house, had friends, future. What I desperately wanted, more than the perfect boyfriend even, was someone to sit with me 24/7. A dead relationship with boyfriend I didn't really love had just ended. Missed his kids far more than I missed him. Didn't want my mother, but mine was useless in relationships. Just a friend. Didn't want to be alone. The darkness at night scared me. Being alone scared me. I wanted to talk to someone, in person or by phone 24/7. I went to work every day. Lost weight, thinnest time in my life, cause I just wasn't interested in food. Wasn't interested in anything really. What changed all this? I attempted suicide. My intention was serious. The execution poor. I lived. I got medications. I set my life in a slightly different direction. Thought about what I really wanted, what made me happy/ smile. Set a plan to get those things and get rid of the things that weren't making me happy. It wasn't an overnight overhaul. It was a new direction. But it was the combo of medications (old ones not SSRIs) and new look at life that did it. Got a dog. Became a foster parent. Gave my 3 mo notice at work. Many years later now. I know the signs of depression. Have never been that bad again. Pay much more attention to making myself happy today... Not biding time waiting for Mr. Right. My happiness comes from within.. Not from a partner. I have my fair share of nasty childhood history, bad habits, etc. Over the years I've had therapy for various reasons not the least of which was my gift from God. Therapy has been great. But back then it was freeing myself from what my family and society said I should do and be. Being me. [/QUOTE]
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