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<blockquote data-quote="buddy" data-source="post: 501248" data-attributes="member: 12886"><p>gosh I am sorry for your hurts....</p><p></p><p>I will say this... EVERY single kid in my family....my sisters have five between them and I have one... every single one would rather be with nana or at grandpa/grandma M's houses. Really they dont spoil them or anything... just that they are grandmas and a grandpa.</p><p></p><p>I know it is different in ways from your situation partially because their time at home (except my son) is not volatile....but it does make sense. Usually nanas and papas dont have to do any of the discipline and limit setting. </p><p></p><p>My house is always a disaster. I have a hole and stuff on the walls from Q throwing water colors on the walls and his dirty hands all over. I wash them but the stuff sinks in. Our carpet is old, I clean it but it is old rental carpet so not pretty by any means. </p><p></p><p>Look, if it is safe, how it looks does not matter. NO WAY CPS would even take a call about decor! Now, if it was cold in winter, garbage all over, etc...(and it could be, still not criticizing...) then it is time to fix those things. </p><p></p><p>My son only does community based things... they could stay home but we dont really need that as much as a break from each other so they go out and do things in the community and he learns to order and pay for things himself. He needs to know how to wait in lines. He needs to go up and down elevators ok... etc. When at a place with other kids he learns to talk appropriately, to take turns etc.</p><p></p><p>It is so nice to have that break, I used to get all hung up on the goals... now I realize that just having that routine for him and his getting out with them gives us a stress break from each other and so when we are together things go better. </p><p></p><p>Hope it goes ok... HUGS</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="buddy, post: 501248, member: 12886"] gosh I am sorry for your hurts.... I will say this... EVERY single kid in my family....my sisters have five between them and I have one... every single one would rather be with nana or at grandpa/grandma M's houses. Really they dont spoil them or anything... just that they are grandmas and a grandpa. I know it is different in ways from your situation partially because their time at home (except my son) is not volatile....but it does make sense. Usually nanas and papas dont have to do any of the discipline and limit setting. My house is always a disaster. I have a hole and stuff on the walls from Q throwing water colors on the walls and his dirty hands all over. I wash them but the stuff sinks in. Our carpet is old, I clean it but it is old rental carpet so not pretty by any means. Look, if it is safe, how it looks does not matter. NO WAY CPS would even take a call about decor! Now, if it was cold in winter, garbage all over, etc...(and it could be, still not criticizing...) then it is time to fix those things. My son only does community based things... they could stay home but we dont really need that as much as a break from each other so they go out and do things in the community and he learns to order and pay for things himself. He needs to know how to wait in lines. He needs to go up and down elevators ok... etc. When at a place with other kids he learns to talk appropriately, to take turns etc. It is so nice to have that break, I used to get all hung up on the goals... now I realize that just having that routine for him and his getting out with them gives us a stress break from each other and so when we are together things go better. Hope it goes ok... HUGS [/QUOTE]
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