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Now that I kicked my 18 year old daughter out, where do I go from here?
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<blockquote data-quote="bluebell" data-source="post: 709088" data-attributes="member: 16761"><p>I have a daughter 17 who was in a controlling relationship last year. I know she is much younger, but as you know this tendency starts here. She went back to him once after it was over even though she knew better. I can see where you would kick her out, she was not following your rules and you gave her plenty of chances. She was able to stay away from him after we established a boycott on driving and clothing/beauty purchases. She has another boyfriend now but he is not controlling. He seems to forget he has a girlfriend every now and then but he is 17 <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /> </p><p> I have thought through these 'older' scenarios in my head, and I would allow my daughter to visit without the boyfriend. I would maybe even take her to lunch. But no way would I take her to Ulta. That is the only leverage I would have - if I gave in to buying eyelashes - what else would she need me for? <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /> But seriously, my daughter is jaw-dropping beautiful (partial here too) and has a lot of the qualities you describe, very humble and innocent. Oddly enough, she has had nothing but drama from other girls so doesn't really have any good girlfriends like I did growing up. She adores her animals too. I never thought that these qualities would make her vulnerable to abuse, I really naively thought that only girls with 'daddy issues' would cling to an abuser. And she is very close to her father (it sounds like yours is too). Stay strong!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="bluebell, post: 709088, member: 16761"] I have a daughter 17 who was in a controlling relationship last year. I know she is much younger, but as you know this tendency starts here. She went back to him once after it was over even though she knew better. I can see where you would kick her out, she was not following your rules and you gave her plenty of chances. She was able to stay away from him after we established a boycott on driving and clothing/beauty purchases. She has another boyfriend now but he is not controlling. He seems to forget he has a girlfriend every now and then but he is 17 :) I have thought through these 'older' scenarios in my head, and I would allow my daughter to visit without the boyfriend. I would maybe even take her to lunch. But no way would I take her to Ulta. That is the only leverage I would have - if I gave in to buying eyelashes - what else would she need me for? :) But seriously, my daughter is jaw-dropping beautiful (partial here too) and has a lot of the qualities you describe, very humble and innocent. Oddly enough, she has had nothing but drama from other girls so doesn't really have any good girlfriends like I did growing up. She adores her animals too. I never thought that these qualities would make her vulnerable to abuse, I really naively thought that only girls with 'daddy issues' would cling to an abuser. And she is very close to her father (it sounds like yours is too). Stay strong! [/QUOTE]
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Now that I kicked my 18 year old daughter out, where do I go from here?
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