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Substance Abuse
of Saw difficult child in jail last nightnk
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<blockquote data-quote="Zardo" data-source="post: 597826" data-attributes="member: 12490"><p>In my difficult child's times of anger and denial - he claims similar things - we were too strict - we pushed him to be this way - sent him to Wilderness for things other parents look the other way at etc. The truth of the matter is that my difficult child has been totally out of control since the summer before freshman year. Like you, when we sent him to Wilderness we had no other option. Mind you, he had been expelled form public school and was on his way to the same fate in the private school. The gaul of them thinking that they can stay in your home and subject your family to total disregard for any boundary or rule that is in their best interest is beyond me. When we sent him away - we had tried multiple times in many ways to intervene - NOTHING WAS WORKING. He needed more help and we needed a break and a professional perspective. After 2 years of different forms of treatment, I do think he understands betternow - although not always able to act on what he knows. At one point this past year, the IOP lead was asking me to "back off" a bit - difficult child talked a lot about being sent away and feeling different that other kids. It was really just a deflection ploy as his use was worse than ever and I was onto it. Be careful what you choose to "accept" that he says. His choices are his - all kids get grounded and have limits - for most - they may get frustrated but they deal with it. For ours, it give them and excuse to "strike back" or something to blame for their choices. The truth is that he has created his own situation. When he understands that he will figure out a way to live differently.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Zardo, post: 597826, member: 12490"] In my difficult child's times of anger and denial - he claims similar things - we were too strict - we pushed him to be this way - sent him to Wilderness for things other parents look the other way at etc. The truth of the matter is that my difficult child has been totally out of control since the summer before freshman year. Like you, when we sent him to Wilderness we had no other option. Mind you, he had been expelled form public school and was on his way to the same fate in the private school. The gaul of them thinking that they can stay in your home and subject your family to total disregard for any boundary or rule that is in their best interest is beyond me. When we sent him away - we had tried multiple times in many ways to intervene - NOTHING WAS WORKING. He needed more help and we needed a break and a professional perspective. After 2 years of different forms of treatment, I do think he understands betternow - although not always able to act on what he knows. At one point this past year, the IOP lead was asking me to "back off" a bit - difficult child talked a lot about being sent away and feeling different that other kids. It was really just a deflection ploy as his use was worse than ever and I was onto it. Be careful what you choose to "accept" that he says. His choices are his - all kids get grounded and have limits - for most - they may get frustrated but they deal with it. For ours, it give them and excuse to "strike back" or something to blame for their choices. The truth is that he has created his own situation. When he understands that he will figure out a way to live differently. [/QUOTE]
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