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Parent Emeritus
ok...I want to know, enabling or just being a mom
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<blockquote data-quote="Nomad" data-source="post: 440005"><p>Not sure...probably not. Some thought might need to be given to what has been going on...how much you have given them all along, how much effort they are putting into being self sufficient, etc. AND of course, the ac needs to STAY PUT! (Not sold now or later for drugs, etc.)</p><p></p><p>If it honestly and truly is a birthday gift for July and you are calling it a birthday gift, then by all means do NOT get him a birthday gift in July. Not even a paper clip. Instead, perhaps a card (with a note re: the ac) and maybe (and at most) make his favorite dessert.</p><p>Might be real cute to have them over for coffee and cake (plus the card). Do NOT be tempted to give in and get "a little something."</p><p></p><p>We just know that enabling is NOT a good thing. AND usually when someone is uncomfortable enough, it'll get them moving in a positive/forward moving direction. It's GOOOD that you are giving this thought.</p><p></p><p>But I totally "get" where you are coming from with this...some important extenuating circumstances (the pregnancy) and having them back at your place is NOT a good idea at all.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nomad, post: 440005"] Not sure...probably not. Some thought might need to be given to what has been going on...how much you have given them all along, how much effort they are putting into being self sufficient, etc. AND of course, the ac needs to STAY PUT! (Not sold now or later for drugs, etc.) If it honestly and truly is a birthday gift for July and you are calling it a birthday gift, then by all means do NOT get him a birthday gift in July. Not even a paper clip. Instead, perhaps a card (with a note re: the ac) and maybe (and at most) make his favorite dessert. Might be real cute to have them over for coffee and cake (plus the card). Do NOT be tempted to give in and get "a little something." We just know that enabling is NOT a good thing. AND usually when someone is uncomfortable enough, it'll get them moving in a positive/forward moving direction. It's GOOOD that you are giving this thought. But I totally "get" where you are coming from with this...some important extenuating circumstances (the pregnancy) and having them back at your place is NOT a good idea at all. [/QUOTE]
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Parent Emeritus
ok...I want to know, enabling or just being a mom
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