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Oops I Did it Again and a Question
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 723383" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>You probably would feel much better not reading your daughter's social media or texts. I didnt know your daughter worked, but she has to and you dont. So what? Its none of her business. Bet if you dared to criticize her she would have an adult toddler fit. I have witnessed them. They are not pretty.</p><p></p><p>I was a stay at home mom too but hardly had time to sit on my butt with my kids and the rest of the neighborhood kids in my house most of the time. I drove everyone around, fed thrm, dried their tears, talked to them. I used to be jealous sometimes of working moms! But I chose to work only part time when my hub was at home and not put them in daycare, and to be there for them. It was a firm, unshakable choice. But it was not an easy choice. It was hard and could leave me craving adult company, ehich my ex didnt give me.</p><p></p><p>You earned the right to sit and watch TV and play games for the rest of your life!! It is YOUR life! My hub is retiring at 62, we bought an RV, we are going to retire and travel. Anyone who doesnt like it, my kids included, can just not like it. Too bad. We can choose our own older years. We did our time.</p><p></p><p>I think learning to enjoy your own life, whatever you want it to be, and engage with positive people rather than your daughter would help you AND your daughter. If an adult child is acting like a two year old brat is it not good parenting for us to not allow the adult to behave badly? I think we help them when we force respectful behavior, just like we did when they were little. This can involve no contact unless Daughter is civil and nice. It only works for us if we dont read their social media and texts. You can tell her you will only communicate with her in actual phone calls and that if she is not nice to you, you will disconnect the call. Then do it.</p><p>I did this with my oldest who can be very rude. It took a while for him to believe I meant it, but he hasnt been rude for a long time now.</p><p>Abuse is abuse, our adult child or not. You dont need to be abused just because it is your child who is abusing you. That is not healthy for either of you. Please be good to yourself.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 723383, member: 1550"] You probably would feel much better not reading your daughter's social media or texts. I didnt know your daughter worked, but she has to and you dont. So what? Its none of her business. Bet if you dared to criticize her she would have an adult toddler fit. I have witnessed them. They are not pretty. I was a stay at home mom too but hardly had time to sit on my butt with my kids and the rest of the neighborhood kids in my house most of the time. I drove everyone around, fed thrm, dried their tears, talked to them. I used to be jealous sometimes of working moms! But I chose to work only part time when my hub was at home and not put them in daycare, and to be there for them. It was a firm, unshakable choice. But it was not an easy choice. It was hard and could leave me craving adult company, ehich my ex didnt give me. You earned the right to sit and watch TV and play games for the rest of your life!! It is YOUR life! My hub is retiring at 62, we bought an RV, we are going to retire and travel. Anyone who doesnt like it, my kids included, can just not like it. Too bad. We can choose our own older years. We did our time. I think learning to enjoy your own life, whatever you want it to be, and engage with positive people rather than your daughter would help you AND your daughter. If an adult child is acting like a two year old brat is it not good parenting for us to not allow the adult to behave badly? I think we help them when we force respectful behavior, just like we did when they were little. This can involve no contact unless Daughter is civil and nice. It only works for us if we dont read their social media and texts. You can tell her you will only communicate with her in actual phone calls and that if she is not nice to you, you will disconnect the call. Then do it. I did this with my oldest who can be very rude. It took a while for him to believe I meant it, but he hasnt been rude for a long time now. Abuse is abuse, our adult child or not. You dont need to be abused just because it is your child who is abusing you. That is not healthy for either of you. Please be good to yourself. [/QUOTE]
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Oops I Did it Again and a Question
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