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Opinions on home schooling difficult child because he does not get along with others
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 634558" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>I have a son on the autism spectrum and school was what made him almost normal <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /> as an adult. He got special supports, a special education class for all kinds of children (not just children on the spectrum...great teacher too!), social skills, study skills and actually caught up with a group of smart "nerds" and special needs kids who hung together at lunch and were friends throughout school. If i had kept him home, he wouldn't have had any help learning how to live without me. Now he has his own place, a part time job and relies on special adult supports if he needs them (honestly, he barely needs them). Disability supplements his part-time job. He is a very happy young man. I don't think a child with autistic spectrum should be at home for school nor do I think he should go to school without help like a child who is not on the spectrum. There is a happy medium that is very helpful. The school, once in high school will start arranging his adult life too and this won't happen at home. My son just seems to do better and better every year. I'm not sure all autistic children can learn this, but my son is actually quite appropriate when speaking to others now. This was not the case at a younger age. He did not speak, except to echo, until he was 4 1/2. He did not potty until then either. Now he can pass as maybe just being a little different. Or a little shy, although that is changing.</p><p></p><p>My son went to school in a special small bus. He was not exposed to the bullies on the ride up and back and he enjoyed his ride. There was an aide on the bus. Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) kids are very naive and this persists throughout their lives. They need more protection than other children because of their disability and the IEP should make it clear an aide is to watch him so he isn't bullied. The aide doesn't have to stand near him, just watch. Also, my son did great in a Special Education class for reading and math. He was mainstreamed for the rest, with an aide. All this helped him feel safe and he did quite well academically and was never picked on. He has no bad memories of school.Naivety is an Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) trait. At age 21, my son would probably still let a stranger live in his apartment...and get robbed blind. This is where adult supports help him. His caseworker would find out and never allow it to keep happening. My son is also very poor at lying so you find out everything he wants to hide...lol.</p><p></p><p>Your son's rudeness is a function of Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD), most likely. He doesn't understand how to talk to other people. He doesn't realize perhaps that he is being inappropriate. This is where the school can help. You've got to get an advocate and insist on the right kind of IEP and supports for your boy. Forget labels of ADHD and ODD. They are both a part of the spectrum because spectrum kids are easily frustrated and also have hyperactivity and attention issues. Try to focus on getting him the proper help for Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD).j</p><p></p><p>To me he does not sound like he has an impending personality disorder. He sounds classic Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD). I do have one son with many traits of a personality disorder and he was manipulative and mean from a very early age. It was way different than Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD). In fact, he was a gifted child intellectually. Don't think personality disorder with your child.</p><p></p><p>Good luck! <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 634558, member: 1550"] I have a son on the autism spectrum and school was what made him almost normal :) as an adult. He got special supports, a special education class for all kinds of children (not just children on the spectrum...great teacher too!), social skills, study skills and actually caught up with a group of smart "nerds" and special needs kids who hung together at lunch and were friends throughout school. If i had kept him home, he wouldn't have had any help learning how to live without me. Now he has his own place, a part time job and relies on special adult supports if he needs them (honestly, he barely needs them). Disability supplements his part-time job. He is a very happy young man. I don't think a child with autistic spectrum should be at home for school nor do I think he should go to school without help like a child who is not on the spectrum. There is a happy medium that is very helpful. The school, once in high school will start arranging his adult life too and this won't happen at home. My son just seems to do better and better every year. I'm not sure all autistic children can learn this, but my son is actually quite appropriate when speaking to others now. This was not the case at a younger age. He did not speak, except to echo, until he was 4 1/2. He did not potty until then either. Now he can pass as maybe just being a little different. Or a little shy, although that is changing. My son went to school in a special small bus. He was not exposed to the bullies on the ride up and back and he enjoyed his ride. There was an aide on the bus. Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) kids are very naive and this persists throughout their lives. They need more protection than other children because of their disability and the IEP should make it clear an aide is to watch him so he isn't bullied. The aide doesn't have to stand near him, just watch. Also, my son did great in a Special Education class for reading and math. He was mainstreamed for the rest, with an aide. All this helped him feel safe and he did quite well academically and was never picked on. He has no bad memories of school.Naivety is an Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) trait. At age 21, my son would probably still let a stranger live in his apartment...and get robbed blind. This is where adult supports help him. His caseworker would find out and never allow it to keep happening. My son is also very poor at lying so you find out everything he wants to hide...lol. Your son's rudeness is a function of Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD), most likely. He doesn't understand how to talk to other people. He doesn't realize perhaps that he is being inappropriate. This is where the school can help. You've got to get an advocate and insist on the right kind of IEP and supports for your boy. Forget labels of ADHD and ODD. They are both a part of the spectrum because spectrum kids are easily frustrated and also have hyperactivity and attention issues. Try to focus on getting him the proper help for Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD).j To me he does not sound like he has an impending personality disorder. He sounds classic Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD). I do have one son with many traits of a personality disorder and he was manipulative and mean from a very early age. It was way different than Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD). In fact, he was a gifted child intellectually. Don't think personality disorder with your child. Good luck! :) [/QUOTE]
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