Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
General Discussions
The Watercooler
Parents refuse to be around my husband...
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="dreamer" data-source="post: 136400" data-attributes="member: 1697"><p>well, you could hang in there, like dummy me did....(I beieved dhs docs and lawyer when they told me they would have me arrested for leaving my "poor helpless" sick disabled veteran.....</p><p></p><p>So here I am all these years later-- um, when my mom was dying and we reunited so I could provide her deathbed care- my husband went off sick to va hospital----did not even tell me our son poked out his eye. Does not remember the 2 9 hour surgeries at a hospital 5 hours away my son had, usually does not remember my son lost vision. </p><p>WHen I was very ill and a quadriplegic for a few years due to a rheumatic illness, he went to his PTSD group and whined I was too sick to take care of him. </p><p>yesterday I was at MY doctor and am now awaiting results of liver involvement rom my automimmune disorder and eye involvement......so what does my lovely husband do? </p><p>First he parked the car in middle of driveway this morning, so easy child could not get in drive, so she comes in PMSing, mad cuz she wound up walking in knee deep mud cuz of dad. (nevermind she uses dads car) </p><p>So she yells at him, so he in his wisdom tantrums, gets in MY car and punches it- without looking- into traffic, sends a car going by up into a yard so as not to hit my car. Then he backs out the other car and almost does the same thing, plus drives it in the mud in front of house. SO now we have where easy child was stuck in mud on one side, deep ruts and now his deep ruts in front of house. Nice. Lovely. </p><p>and neighbors now also have matching nice deep ruts from the car that was coming wanting to avoid hitting my car. OK, a few mins later-- dog barks to come in. I was up to elbows in raw hamburger, makeing meatloaf for dinner. I reach for a towel, but husband stomps in..(Usually he ignores any and all going on around here, wrapped up in his videogames) and lets dog in, cuz "that infernal barking is driving me nuts" Um dog had only barked one woof. and I WAS letting him in. SO dog sniffs at husband, prolly wondering why husband let him in? husband drops a hot ash (by accident) on dogs head. WTF? so husband begins holleing the dog knocked hot ash onto his own head, husband claims he got it....5 mins later poor dog comes to me shaking his head..yup- he still has burning ash on his head. WTF? </p><p>Then son was at a friends, a rare treat, but he calls while my hands are still in meat..needs a ride hme NOW, and he sounds strange, so I worry something maybe happened? </p><p>I go to door, and husband gets mad and throws his PS controller across the room at the TV. Why? becuz I had the nerve to walk in his vicinity and it distracted him from his game. </p><p></p><p>A few mins ago I was cleaning up dinner.....but husband, he does not always come eat when told dinner is ready- so I peeked around the corner to ask him, and yikes if he didn't again go into a tantrum. </p><p></p><p>Well heck with THAT. </p><p>It finally dawned on me. If anyone is sick, my husband is sicker. If anyone is hurt, my husband is hurt worse. husband will top your best always......his job was The Most Demanding.....his time in Nam was worse than anyone elses.....his childhood was awful. (no, not really, not at all) If it is your birthday? he will land in ER or psychiatric unit or something.anything.becuz NOONE else can be the focus. Ever. </p><p>He went to my best friends funeral.and tried to tell the husband that he knew what it was like cuz, um...his parents were gone. Um dude? husband? You are almost 60 yrs old...thats a LOT different than being 30 and haveing 2 small kids and loseing your WIFE. </p><p>He refused to go to my moms funeral. </p><p></p><p>My mother gave up on me and my husband YEARS ago, and dummy me stayed with husband. (aactually there are a LOT of dumb reasons why I did) My children got deprived of grandparents, aunts and uncles........becuz I stayed with a jerk. </p><p>Sure, I can relate all his mental and physical reasons......all his "excuses" everything. But in the end? what I wound up with? so NOT worth it. Gave up everything cuz of him, and keeping him all I have is some guy who has to have tantrums simply becuz MY health is in the toilet? Nice. Does he help with ANYTHING? nope. Oh once upon a time, many many years ago he was a neat guy......but- he has NOT been a companion, a friend, a lover, a contributor to anything chore related, financial or anything else in 15 years. Mostly he just chased away anyone else who might have ever helped me with anything. Ah love is blind and I did not see clearly even when my mom and siblings backed out. </p><p></p><p>Now when one of my kids is seeing someone who acts like that- I tell my kids straight out- do you think it is easy fun or nice to be your parent and watch you let some jerk treat you bad? My family hated subjecting themselves to my husband, BUT I am sure they also hated watching ME subject MYSELF to being treated so bad. I am also pretty sure they also wondered WHY I chose to let them go away and continue to stay with a jerk who would cause them to stay away. </p><p></p><p>I can tell you with absolute certainty- you do NOT want to be SERIOUSLY ill and be with someone like THAT. Oh trust me. I did lay here, hungry, thirsty, soiled.....sometimes for a few DAYS......becuz my husband simply HAD to be "sicker". and becuz my husband was here....noone else WOULD come. </p><p></p><p>NOT a "nice" place to be, I can definetly say that with first hand knowledge.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="dreamer, post: 136400, member: 1697"] well, you could hang in there, like dummy me did....(I beieved dhs docs and lawyer when they told me they would have me arrested for leaving my "poor helpless" sick disabled veteran..... So here I am all these years later-- um, when my mom was dying and we reunited so I could provide her deathbed care- my husband went off sick to va hospital----did not even tell me our son poked out his eye. Does not remember the 2 9 hour surgeries at a hospital 5 hours away my son had, usually does not remember my son lost vision. WHen I was very ill and a quadriplegic for a few years due to a rheumatic illness, he went to his PTSD group and whined I was too sick to take care of him. yesterday I was at MY doctor and am now awaiting results of liver involvement rom my automimmune disorder and eye involvement......so what does my lovely husband do? First he parked the car in middle of driveway this morning, so easy child could not get in drive, so she comes in PMSing, mad cuz she wound up walking in knee deep mud cuz of dad. (nevermind she uses dads car) So she yells at him, so he in his wisdom tantrums, gets in MY car and punches it- without looking- into traffic, sends a car going by up into a yard so as not to hit my car. Then he backs out the other car and almost does the same thing, plus drives it in the mud in front of house. SO now we have where easy child was stuck in mud on one side, deep ruts and now his deep ruts in front of house. Nice. Lovely. and neighbors now also have matching nice deep ruts from the car that was coming wanting to avoid hitting my car. OK, a few mins later-- dog barks to come in. I was up to elbows in raw hamburger, makeing meatloaf for dinner. I reach for a towel, but husband stomps in..(Usually he ignores any and all going on around here, wrapped up in his videogames) and lets dog in, cuz "that infernal barking is driving me nuts" Um dog had only barked one woof. and I WAS letting him in. SO dog sniffs at husband, prolly wondering why husband let him in? husband drops a hot ash (by accident) on dogs head. WTF? so husband begins holleing the dog knocked hot ash onto his own head, husband claims he got it....5 mins later poor dog comes to me shaking his head..yup- he still has burning ash on his head. WTF? Then son was at a friends, a rare treat, but he calls while my hands are still in meat..needs a ride hme NOW, and he sounds strange, so I worry something maybe happened? I go to door, and husband gets mad and throws his PS controller across the room at the TV. Why? becuz I had the nerve to walk in his vicinity and it distracted him from his game. A few mins ago I was cleaning up dinner.....but husband, he does not always come eat when told dinner is ready- so I peeked around the corner to ask him, and yikes if he didn't again go into a tantrum. Well heck with THAT. It finally dawned on me. If anyone is sick, my husband is sicker. If anyone is hurt, my husband is hurt worse. husband will top your best always......his job was The Most Demanding.....his time in Nam was worse than anyone elses.....his childhood was awful. (no, not really, not at all) If it is your birthday? he will land in ER or psychiatric unit or something.anything.becuz NOONE else can be the focus. Ever. He went to my best friends funeral.and tried to tell the husband that he knew what it was like cuz, um...his parents were gone. Um dude? husband? You are almost 60 yrs old...thats a LOT different than being 30 and haveing 2 small kids and loseing your WIFE. He refused to go to my moms funeral. My mother gave up on me and my husband YEARS ago, and dummy me stayed with husband. (aactually there are a LOT of dumb reasons why I did) My children got deprived of grandparents, aunts and uncles........becuz I stayed with a jerk. Sure, I can relate all his mental and physical reasons......all his "excuses" everything. But in the end? what I wound up with? so NOT worth it. Gave up everything cuz of him, and keeping him all I have is some guy who has to have tantrums simply becuz MY health is in the toilet? Nice. Does he help with ANYTHING? nope. Oh once upon a time, many many years ago he was a neat guy......but- he has NOT been a companion, a friend, a lover, a contributor to anything chore related, financial or anything else in 15 years. Mostly he just chased away anyone else who might have ever helped me with anything. Ah love is blind and I did not see clearly even when my mom and siblings backed out. Now when one of my kids is seeing someone who acts like that- I tell my kids straight out- do you think it is easy fun or nice to be your parent and watch you let some jerk treat you bad? My family hated subjecting themselves to my husband, BUT I am sure they also hated watching ME subject MYSELF to being treated so bad. I am also pretty sure they also wondered WHY I chose to let them go away and continue to stay with a jerk who would cause them to stay away. I can tell you with absolute certainty- you do NOT want to be SERIOUSLY ill and be with someone like THAT. Oh trust me. I did lay here, hungry, thirsty, soiled.....sometimes for a few DAYS......becuz my husband simply HAD to be "sicker". and becuz my husband was here....noone else WOULD come. NOT a "nice" place to be, I can definetly say that with first hand knowledge. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
General Discussions
The Watercooler
Parents refuse to be around my husband...
Top