Passing through

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by mrscatinthehat, May 19, 2008.

  1. mrscatinthehat

    mrscatinthehat Seussical

    Well, I know it has been awhile. So much going on that it is hard to keep up with myself. difficult child 1 is 18 at the end of this month. She goes through graduation on thursday (she isn't getting her diploma because she will be finishing her IEP requirements etc) This month alone we have had several of the three hour trips there. Tonight we go again. Senior night for choir. Already went to the spring concert earlier this month. From everything we can tell we have a plan for her when she turns 18. It took soooo much strength to get through the unknown. So many changes happened. We lost our caseworker (we had no idea that she was pregnant until she had to go on mandatory bedrest). Never got a call from them to that affect heard about it from difficult child 1's facility. don't know much about the place she is going. Supposed to be a good place for adults. It is a house with 24 hour staff and only 4 residents. This thought sounds good. Hopefully it will work good. She did have a bit of a break through with her counselor one day though. She was so inconsistant with things that she had said that no one was understanding. Then she said that no one would believe her if she told what really happened. She said that it was actually difficult child 2 that had done things to her but figured because she was older that no one would believe her. She knows so little of what has happened with difficult child 2 but this makes a lot of sense. Scary to think how long he has been preying on people. We are working on getting the guardianship of her for the first few years that she still needs treatment. That way we know that things will be handled (well ok at least we will know that she is protected from some things). She wasn't originally happy about this but she came around after we explained things a bit. Like that we didn't plan on it forever.

    difficult child 2 is starting to stall out at the state training school (like I couldn't have predicted that). He has barely just begun. The staff was so proud that he was cooperating etc. Uh huh. I was hoping with part of myself that it would be different but the rational side of me kept saying "just wait the real part of him will come back". Sure enough he is starting to come back.

    Then we have easy child. We have been to two cardiologists already. We go tommorow to see another and a pulmonoligist. She is not handling not being active well. She has not been able to do anything more than a walk for a long time now. The doctors can't pin point what is exactly wrong (who boy like that isn't the most fun thing in the world to go through again). I am trying really hard not to bubble wrap her up (like she would stand still for that). But the more tests with few answers is horrible. I thought no diagnosis was bad with the other two. Argh at least they were being treated. This is so not cool to deal with. Over the weekend we were with family and decided to walk the 10 blocks to where husband was. Thinking nothing of it because she walks 6 blocks to school everyday. When we got there she was just not acting right. At that point I wanted to say nope no more walking to school for you. But I didn't. She isn't ever alone on the walk. And I don't know for sure if I was seeing someing that wasn't there.

    Unfortunately with everything going on I keep getting snappy with husband. He informed me this morning I didnt' need to keep yelling at him. I said I wouldn't if he would just listen. Then I stopped talking altogether. Trying to figure out how to fit another job into my world. Ah well. This to shall pass.

    Hope all is going reasonable with everyone else. Sorry I am not here on a more regular basis but I am just so drained lately that aside from a very few things I just am not on the computer much.

  2. SearchingForRainbows

    SearchingForRainbows Active Member


    It's good to hear from you but I'm sorry you have so much on your plate!!! I'm glad difficult child 1's facility seems like a good place and that you have a plan.

    I'm sorry to hear about difficult child 2's true colors coming through. However, it is definitely important for the staff to learn what he is really like. I hope he gets the help he so desperately needs!!!

    My heart goes out to you - I'm keeping your easy child in my thoughts and prayers... If you have a chance, please update us after easy child's appointments with the specialists tomorrow. I'm keeping her in my thoughts and prayers that the doctors find out what is wrong, treat her, and she is on the road to a speedy recovery soon... WFEN
  3. Star*

    Star* call 911


    It was so good to hear from you. Understandable why you haven't popped in more than you do. That's a lot on your plate isn't it. It sounds like difficult child 1 is really REALLY doing well. It peeves me to no end when these kids finally get used to someone enough to open up and then they leave. I hope for your daughter's sake she can find someone to talk to and work through what difficult child 2 did to her.

    You sound broken hearted about difficult child 2 and his progress so I'm just going to lift you up with CD MOM support and tell you that yes, in fact, this too shall pass. It makes me wonder for hours though. If they can get it for a short period of time in spurts WHAT exactly is missing genetically or chemically in them that they just can't keep up the good behavior. I really have pondered about 4 years of my life on this question - nearly 1.25 months on just SAYING WHY. (Not totally sure about the time but it feels right) lol.

    And for your easy child - I wasn't aware that she had heart problems. I am holding her in my good thoughts that it is something simple and uncomplicated - I really would like to have seen the look on your face when the doctor said "And you keep a teenager calm and still." (Pass me something to hide my laughing.)

    I bet you and husband could use a night OUT or IN without any kids for about a MONTH. My idea of romance anymore is to unplug the phones, take a bath, maybe shave my legs and have DF bring me a cup of broth in bed while I read. His is nearly the same but he won't shave his legs.

    Hugs to you - Hug the Weiner dog for me!