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Pee and Pooping pants - 7 yrs old - any success stories
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 407974" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>We had problems with this with both boys. We also had problems with easy child 2/difficult child 2 as well as the boys, wiping excreta on the walls. My solution was to make the kids scrub it off the walls themselves. When I couldn't find out which kid had done it, I made them take turns.</p><p></p><p>A common cause of this sort of problem in a child who you feel should be showing bladder/bowel control by this stage - sensory integration problems. You can get this with just ADHD, but what you describe - ADHD, anxiety issues and now what sounds like sensory issues - you should check out Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) in some form. Look up Asperger's, see what you think. </p><p></p><p>If your child is disconnected from his body and doesn't recognise his body signals, you have to wait until his body is ready (to a certain extent) and you can also work to train his body to have the connections. There are ways to do this - conditioned response is a good way to go. But until he gets that conneciton, you will have limited success.</p><p></p><p>Example - difficult child 3 was in Pull-Ups at night until he was about 8. Every morning he would be soaked. We tried everything - restricting fluids before bedtime. No luck. Getting him up to go to the toilet ("toilet time!") when we were going to bed. Limited luck. The biggest problem, we finally realised, was that the Pull-Ups were TOO good at keeping him dry. He just didn't get the physical connection between weeing in his Pull-Ups, and the feeling of wetness. </p><p></p><p>Summer made it easier - we ensured there was a large vinyl sheet under his bedding (to protect the mattress) and put him to bed (warily!) in underpants. We had a few wet nights but he got the message.</p><p></p><p>Another option I wish we had tried - putting underpants on difficult child 3, under his Pull-Ups. He still would have got the feeling of wetness but we wouldn't have had flooded beds.</p><p></p><p>The pooping - again, we found a lot of problems with this. difficult child 1 did not have the understanding, he felt that all he had to do was apply enough self-discipline and he would never need to excrete again. He would not put it in his nappy, he would not put it in the toilet or potty. Instead, he would hold on to it. For a week or more. He would get more restless as the week progressed. It was a horrible time.</p><p></p><p>When difficult child 1 was older, well into his teens, he still needed to be reminded to go empty his bowels. He just was not aware.</p><p></p><p>With difficult child 3's bowel training - he just didn't get the connection. I kept having to go to the school to change him, clean him up. We just had to wait until he was able to make the connection. In the meantime, we developed a strategy to cope. No punishment, no shame. Just matter-of-fact management as if he had an incontinence issue beyond his control.</p><p></p><p>We actually took difficult child 3 to a specialist consultant in toileting issues. A physiotherapist who specialised in it. We found this was a big step - having difficult child 3 have the chance to talk it through with someone else, who asked him about how it felt, talked to him about sensory issues actually made him more aware, and also gave him a better sense of personal awareness and control.</p><p></p><p>No problems with difficult child 3 now. Fewer problems than we had with difficult child 1 at that age. difficult child 1 these days - not a problem.</p><p></p><p>At the risk of making a bad joke - this too shall pass!</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 407974, member: 1991"] We had problems with this with both boys. We also had problems with easy child 2/difficult child 2 as well as the boys, wiping excreta on the walls. My solution was to make the kids scrub it off the walls themselves. When I couldn't find out which kid had done it, I made them take turns. A common cause of this sort of problem in a child who you feel should be showing bladder/bowel control by this stage - sensory integration problems. You can get this with just ADHD, but what you describe - ADHD, anxiety issues and now what sounds like sensory issues - you should check out Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) in some form. Look up Asperger's, see what you think. If your child is disconnected from his body and doesn't recognise his body signals, you have to wait until his body is ready (to a certain extent) and you can also work to train his body to have the connections. There are ways to do this - conditioned response is a good way to go. But until he gets that conneciton, you will have limited success. Example - difficult child 3 was in Pull-Ups at night until he was about 8. Every morning he would be soaked. We tried everything - restricting fluids before bedtime. No luck. Getting him up to go to the toilet ("toilet time!") when we were going to bed. Limited luck. The biggest problem, we finally realised, was that the Pull-Ups were TOO good at keeping him dry. He just didn't get the physical connection between weeing in his Pull-Ups, and the feeling of wetness. Summer made it easier - we ensured there was a large vinyl sheet under his bedding (to protect the mattress) and put him to bed (warily!) in underpants. We had a few wet nights but he got the message. Another option I wish we had tried - putting underpants on difficult child 3, under his Pull-Ups. He still would have got the feeling of wetness but we wouldn't have had flooded beds. The pooping - again, we found a lot of problems with this. difficult child 1 did not have the understanding, he felt that all he had to do was apply enough self-discipline and he would never need to excrete again. He would not put it in his nappy, he would not put it in the toilet or potty. Instead, he would hold on to it. For a week or more. He would get more restless as the week progressed. It was a horrible time. When difficult child 1 was older, well into his teens, he still needed to be reminded to go empty his bowels. He just was not aware. With difficult child 3's bowel training - he just didn't get the connection. I kept having to go to the school to change him, clean him up. We just had to wait until he was able to make the connection. In the meantime, we developed a strategy to cope. No punishment, no shame. Just matter-of-fact management as if he had an incontinence issue beyond his control. We actually took difficult child 3 to a specialist consultant in toileting issues. A physiotherapist who specialised in it. We found this was a big step - having difficult child 3 have the chance to talk it through with someone else, who asked him about how it felt, talked to him about sensory issues actually made him more aware, and also gave him a better sense of personal awareness and control. No problems with difficult child 3 now. Fewer problems than we had with difficult child 1 at that age. difficult child 1 these days - not a problem. At the risk of making a bad joke - this too shall pass! Marg [/QUOTE]
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