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<blockquote data-quote="Nomad" data-source="post: 290560"><p>I would consider a very small allowance, perhaps twice a week. Understand, that this is temporary. If she spends it all and asks for more...the answer is "NO!" Twice a week, give her a small amount of money for necessities and/or to supplement her Food Stamps. If you are paying for things like rent, pay it directly. Try to give her less than what you are giving her currently. If you go to a Al Anon or Families Anonymous meetings you might be able to speak with other parents who can give you other ideas. One thing that you could also do there is ask other people if they know of any psychologists and/or psychiatrists who have experience working with Bipolar patients. You really need a referral for both. You might tell your daughter that you would no longer be willing to support her at all financially unless she is willing to go to therapy. Additionally, you might explain to your daughter that within the next year, you plan on stopping all support financially with the exception of helping her with medical needs and so she will have to get on disability. Don't let her get all melodramatic on you. Refuse to help her, even speak with her, if she is dispresctful to you. Find out from other parents about low income, disabled housing or even group homes. Seeing a doctor, should actually be helpful getting her on disability. Concentrate on your own mental well being. There is a book on Boundaries that is very good that you can buy at Amazon. The author's last name is Cloud. I would consider getting this at the library or buy it. Additionally, I would google for information about a Families Anonymous meeting and go immediately. YOu will get much support from other parents there. Your daughter might even benefit in a certain way if she sees you moving on. She might get the hint that it is time, past time, for her to do the same. Please call the SS Disability Office tomorrow, as well as google for a FA meeting location. Inch by inch, slowly, one baby step at a time, I would help your daughter get on disability, and end your financial support. Additionally, I would work on your own mental health and develop or strenghthen any outside relationships that you find rewarding.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nomad, post: 290560"] I would consider a very small allowance, perhaps twice a week. Understand, that this is temporary. If she spends it all and asks for more...the answer is "NO!" Twice a week, give her a small amount of money for necessities and/or to supplement her Food Stamps. If you are paying for things like rent, pay it directly. Try to give her less than what you are giving her currently. If you go to a Al Anon or Families Anonymous meetings you might be able to speak with other parents who can give you other ideas. One thing that you could also do there is ask other people if they know of any psychologists and/or psychiatrists who have experience working with Bipolar patients. You really need a referral for both. You might tell your daughter that you would no longer be willing to support her at all financially unless she is willing to go to therapy. Additionally, you might explain to your daughter that within the next year, you plan on stopping all support financially with the exception of helping her with medical needs and so she will have to get on disability. Don't let her get all melodramatic on you. Refuse to help her, even speak with her, if she is dispresctful to you. Find out from other parents about low income, disabled housing or even group homes. Seeing a doctor, should actually be helpful getting her on disability. Concentrate on your own mental well being. There is a book on Boundaries that is very good that you can buy at Amazon. The author's last name is Cloud. I would consider getting this at the library or buy it. Additionally, I would google for information about a Families Anonymous meeting and go immediately. YOu will get much support from other parents there. Your daughter might even benefit in a certain way if she sees you moving on. She might get the hint that it is time, past time, for her to do the same. Please call the SS Disability Office tomorrow, as well as google for a FA meeting location. Inch by inch, slowly, one baby step at a time, I would help your daughter get on disability, and end your financial support. Additionally, I would work on your own mental health and develop or strenghthen any outside relationships that you find rewarding. [/QUOTE]
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