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<blockquote data-quote="Star*" data-source="post: 290699" data-attributes="member: 4964"><p>Hi there,</p><p></p><p>Don't know where in TN you are but thought I would start with this so that you aren't so guilt ridden about your daughters illness - it isn't something that you caused. It may be something that you have passed on genetically - but if you never got help for yourself from your family how would you ever know to get help for her? So I think we need to start with you first - then her. Maybe if you understood a little bit more about the disorder BiPolar (BP) and manic depression it would help - here's a little blurb I found because there is a TON of information on BiPolar (BP) that can snow you under - and like you said you're already overwhelmed - so you don't need a bunch of garbely gook to depress you further but you DO need to start with a good therapist for yourself so that you can see things a bit more clearly to work out issues THEN draw boundaries for your daughter.</p><p></p><p>AND the other thing I see because I've been there is if you are seeing a doctor AND maybe taking an anti-depressant that is putting YOU in a better frame of mind (if you so choose) you won't have to deal with "Well why aren't YOU doing it if it's so good?" from your daughter. I hate when they do that. Even at 32 years old - she'll do that you know. </p><p></p><p>Next you'll need to know where to go for FREE or NEXT to free - if you do not have insurance that will help with mental health exams and again since I don't know where you live - ALL COUNTY MENTAL Health clinics will see you on sliding scale fees or for FREE. It's a federal law. So they have to based on your income. You may live in such a small county that the combine counties - but they are there. ANd in some situations - if you live in a really small town - there are psychlogists and psychiatrists that may see you for a reduced fee if you ask. Some insurance companies have a maximum amount of visits they will allow. I have Blue Cross and gosh - lovely - they will let me have 4 visits. I couldn't tell them about the first month of my life in 4 visits...lol. (sounds like you couldn't begin to tell them about a day in your daughters life in 4 visits) so check with mental health for the freebie. (I like freebies cause I'm super cheap)</p><p></p><p>But to get the ball rolling with your daughter and disability? I think for now I would make a list of the things that I would personally like to see happen from bathing to job interview. If she's living in a small trailer with 4 dogs and a cat there is probably some hoarding issues going on with her that should be addressed not only for her health, but for the health of the animals. I would and have and will forever call the ASPCA on her. THey have to have tags, shots and she will have to produce records to prove they are being taken care of properly. That would do 2 things - Get the animal law enforcement involved in her care - keeping another set of eyes on her - and getting what you feel may be unsanitary conditions manageable for her. </p><p></p><p>Janet is BiPolar (BP) - so from a BiPolar (BP) point of view - she can give you tons of inside info on how they feel, and how they cycle and maybe some suggestions on how to help your daughter get on some medications and stay on them to manage her life. My son thinks he is a BiPolar (BP) and has all the ear marks of BiPolar (BP) and his biofather and his Mother were and self-medicated -not fun people to be around off medication and even MORE not fun to be around when they self medicate.</p><p></p><p>You can go on line and fill out the SS disability paperwork to get the ball rolling without any help - you sign up, get a casenumber (write that and your password down) and fill in the information that you can and you can also go through voc. rehab in your area (I think someone mentioned that here so ops to them <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /></p><p></p><p>But like I said - First things first - and that's you lady - You first - THEN the kid - no matter how bad she's sinking. Getting her started on SSI is a life line -and admitting that you need help to stop enabling her is a HUGE step and you should be congratulated for reaching out. </p><p></p><p>SO.....CONGRATULATIONS! I think you are very brave and very wise and are on your way to helping your daughter in the very best ways!</p><p></p><p>Welcome to the board!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Star*, post: 290699, member: 4964"] Hi there, Don't know where in TN you are but thought I would start with this so that you aren't so guilt ridden about your daughters illness - it isn't something that you caused. It may be something that you have passed on genetically - but if you never got help for yourself from your family how would you ever know to get help for her? So I think we need to start with you first - then her. Maybe if you understood a little bit more about the disorder BiPolar (BP) and manic depression it would help - here's a little blurb I found because there is a TON of information on BiPolar (BP) that can snow you under - and like you said you're already overwhelmed - so you don't need a bunch of garbely gook to depress you further but you DO need to start with a good therapist for yourself so that you can see things a bit more clearly to work out issues THEN draw boundaries for your daughter. AND the other thing I see because I've been there is if you are seeing a doctor AND maybe taking an anti-depressant that is putting YOU in a better frame of mind (if you so choose) you won't have to deal with "Well why aren't YOU doing it if it's so good?" from your daughter. I hate when they do that. Even at 32 years old - she'll do that you know. Next you'll need to know where to go for FREE or NEXT to free - if you do not have insurance that will help with mental health exams and again since I don't know where you live - ALL COUNTY MENTAL Health clinics will see you on sliding scale fees or for FREE. It's a federal law. So they have to based on your income. You may live in such a small county that the combine counties - but they are there. ANd in some situations - if you live in a really small town - there are psychlogists and psychiatrists that may see you for a reduced fee if you ask. Some insurance companies have a maximum amount of visits they will allow. I have Blue Cross and gosh - lovely - they will let me have 4 visits. I couldn't tell them about the first month of my life in 4 visits...lol. (sounds like you couldn't begin to tell them about a day in your daughters life in 4 visits) so check with mental health for the freebie. (I like freebies cause I'm super cheap) But to get the ball rolling with your daughter and disability? I think for now I would make a list of the things that I would personally like to see happen from bathing to job interview. If she's living in a small trailer with 4 dogs and a cat there is probably some hoarding issues going on with her that should be addressed not only for her health, but for the health of the animals. I would and have and will forever call the ASPCA on her. THey have to have tags, shots and she will have to produce records to prove they are being taken care of properly. That would do 2 things - Get the animal law enforcement involved in her care - keeping another set of eyes on her - and getting what you feel may be unsanitary conditions manageable for her. Janet is BiPolar (BP) - so from a BiPolar (BP) point of view - she can give you tons of inside info on how they feel, and how they cycle and maybe some suggestions on how to help your daughter get on some medications and stay on them to manage her life. My son thinks he is a BiPolar (BP) and has all the ear marks of BiPolar (BP) and his biofather and his Mother were and self-medicated -not fun people to be around off medication and even MORE not fun to be around when they self medicate. You can go on line and fill out the SS disability paperwork to get the ball rolling without any help - you sign up, get a casenumber (write that and your password down) and fill in the information that you can and you can also go through voc. rehab in your area (I think someone mentioned that here so ops to them :) But like I said - First things first - and that's you lady - You first - THEN the kid - no matter how bad she's sinking. Getting her started on SSI is a life line -and admitting that you need help to stop enabling her is a HUGE step and you should be congratulated for reaching out. SO.....CONGRATULATIONS! I think you are very brave and very wise and are on your way to helping your daughter in the very best ways! Welcome to the board! [/QUOTE]
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