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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 290749" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Hi there. Welcome to the board.</p><p></p><p>I am mentally ill and have bipolar and trouble working. I did not ever abuse drugs though. Although it's sad to see your daughter making no progress, as one who knows, this is really your daughter's fault. I had terrible reactions to medications to, but I kept on trying them because I wanted to get well. She could be listening to her doctors. A path for someone with bipolar is never easy, but if she won't take the steps, she won't ever get better, no matter if you sacrifice the rest of your life for her. in my opinion, you must be up into the late 50's or 60's and deserve to have a peaceful retirement rather than looking after this daughter. If she is disabled to the point where she can't care for herself, get social services involved. There are group homes for adults. The ones around here are terrific and even drive the people back and forth from sheltered workshops. Many of the workers are also mentally ill, but the adults HAVE to be doing their treatment to get the services.</p><p></p><p>Your daughter may be sick, but she has the choice of being more functional. She should actually call for SSI herself. I doubt they'll let you do it for her. I had to apply on my own and go down to the office. I got it on the first try, BUT I'm very compliant with my treatment. Ditto for trying for low income housing. She needs to do it or she will NEVER get stronger. YES, you can functnion with bipolar. I'm in a support group of adults with bipolar. We are all functioning. Some of us are on disability, but we are living lives, doing things, some are working, we have hobbies, we do clean our house, etc. </p><p></p><p>in my opinion, as one with the disorder, the more you pay her bills, take off work for her, baby her etc. the less incentive she has to move and do things to make herself better. If she is in a depressed state of mind, it takes a lot of motivation to get moving so you are, in a kind way, actually enabling her to do nothing. I know that forcing myself to do something when I am depressed always makes me feel better. Of course, I do take my medication. </p><p></p><p>You deserve to have a life. You didn't cause this. My parents didn't cause this, except for maybe passing along some bad genes. My parents made me do everything myself. They didn't really believe I was sick so I was out of the house at eighteen. I'm glad. It made me learn to take care of myself without their help. By thirty-two, I was married with three kids and working part-time. Things were not perfect then, but I was forced to learn to deal with my illness. Your daughter has the ability to do that as well. But you can't make her do it and paying her bills, even if you feel bad, in my opinion is not helping her.</p><p></p><p>Glad you dropped by. Let us know how it goes <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite8" alt=":D" title="Big Grin :D" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":D" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 290749, member: 1550"] Hi there. Welcome to the board. I am mentally ill and have bipolar and trouble working. I did not ever abuse drugs though. Although it's sad to see your daughter making no progress, as one who knows, this is really your daughter's fault. I had terrible reactions to medications to, but I kept on trying them because I wanted to get well. She could be listening to her doctors. A path for someone with bipolar is never easy, but if she won't take the steps, she won't ever get better, no matter if you sacrifice the rest of your life for her. in my opinion, you must be up into the late 50's or 60's and deserve to have a peaceful retirement rather than looking after this daughter. If she is disabled to the point where she can't care for herself, get social services involved. There are group homes for adults. The ones around here are terrific and even drive the people back and forth from sheltered workshops. Many of the workers are also mentally ill, but the adults HAVE to be doing their treatment to get the services. Your daughter may be sick, but she has the choice of being more functional. She should actually call for SSI herself. I doubt they'll let you do it for her. I had to apply on my own and go down to the office. I got it on the first try, BUT I'm very compliant with my treatment. Ditto for trying for low income housing. She needs to do it or she will NEVER get stronger. YES, you can functnion with bipolar. I'm in a support group of adults with bipolar. We are all functioning. Some of us are on disability, but we are living lives, doing things, some are working, we have hobbies, we do clean our house, etc. in my opinion, as one with the disorder, the more you pay her bills, take off work for her, baby her etc. the less incentive she has to move and do things to make herself better. If she is in a depressed state of mind, it takes a lot of motivation to get moving so you are, in a kind way, actually enabling her to do nothing. I know that forcing myself to do something when I am depressed always makes me feel better. Of course, I do take my medication. You deserve to have a life. You didn't cause this. My parents didn't cause this, except for maybe passing along some bad genes. My parents made me do everything myself. They didn't really believe I was sick so I was out of the house at eighteen. I'm glad. It made me learn to take care of myself without their help. By thirty-two, I was married with three kids and working part-time. Things were not perfect then, but I was forced to learn to deal with my illness. Your daughter has the ability to do that as well. But you can't make her do it and paying her bills, even if you feel bad, in my opinion is not helping her. Glad you dropped by. Let us know how it goes :happy: [/QUOTE]
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