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<blockquote data-quote="katya02" data-source="post: 195373" data-attributes="member: 2884"><p>Hi, I'm late joining but I have to say, jal and jules, your kids sound like clones of my difficult child 2 at that age! He had diagnoses of Asperger's, Early Onset Bi-Polar (EOBP), ODD, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD), Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) not otherwise specified, you name it. He was tried on just about every medication out there, including stims (VERY bad idea). I never came up with a perfect plan but the most helpful book I ever read was When Love is Not Enough by Nancy Thomas. I know she's had some bad press for her second book but the first one is great, in my opinion. She's a therapeutic foster parent for kids with Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) and has had a huge success rate. There's been criticism of the 'holding' technique for Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) but this book doesn't advocate that. Some of the detailed suggestions or stories go farther than your difficult child may need, but you can take what's helpful and leave the rest. The big thing, to me, was her advocacy of powerful parenting, meaning you don't discuss, argue, plead, negotiate, or put up reward charts. (Reward charts never, ever worked for us.) You say something once and then you follow up with action, not words. That sounds too simple but it's best to read the book. The techniques threw my difficult child completely off when he was in control, and when he wasn't in control they worked better than anything else I tried too. We still needed an in-home TTS person many hours/week and school was still h*** to get him to (he behaved there, but went wild at home). But we could cope.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="katya02, post: 195373, member: 2884"] Hi, I'm late joining but I have to say, jal and jules, your kids sound like clones of my difficult child 2 at that age! He had diagnoses of Asperger's, Early Onset Bi-Polar (EOBP), ODD, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD), Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) not otherwise specified, you name it. He was tried on just about every medication out there, including stims (VERY bad idea). I never came up with a perfect plan but the most helpful book I ever read was When Love is Not Enough by Nancy Thomas. I know she's had some bad press for her second book but the first one is great, in my opinion. She's a therapeutic foster parent for kids with Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) and has had a huge success rate. There's been criticism of the 'holding' technique for Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) but this book doesn't advocate that. Some of the detailed suggestions or stories go farther than your difficult child may need, but you can take what's helpful and leave the rest. The big thing, to me, was her advocacy of powerful parenting, meaning you don't discuss, argue, plead, negotiate, or put up reward charts. (Reward charts never, ever worked for us.) You say something once and then you follow up with action, not words. That sounds too simple but it's best to read the book. The techniques threw my difficult child completely off when he was in control, and when he wasn't in control they worked better than anything else I tried too. We still needed an in-home TTS person many hours/week and school was still h*** to get him to (he behaved there, but went wild at home). But we could cope. [/QUOTE]
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