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Possible ODD in my 16 year old. Wher to start?
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<blockquote data-quote="TeDo" data-source="post: 507448"><p>Wow...I am sorry she's treating you this way. You're being such a good dad by trying to find ways to help her. For the food, I'd say keep ALL "junk" food locked up tight or don't buy any. If she doesn't DO anything around the house she shouldn't be given any money or access to anything that costs money, ie cell phone, computer, television, movies, fees for activities, ANYTHING. I have just had to teach my 13 year olds this lesson. Those things cost money so if you can't take care of your responsibilities, you don't get to have the privileges. I had to remind them that the law only requires me to provide access to food (nowhere does it say this includes junk food), adequate shelter, and health care. Nowhere does it say I have to wash laundry that isn't where it should be or pay the fee to play soccer or go to Boy Scouts or even to pay for cable, internet, and cellular service. Those are all privileges that have to be earned. If she insists on doing nothing, she gets nothing. That's how I have been dealing with the "typical teen" stuff. Showing respect to others int he house also falls under the responsibilities. Nowhere does it say I have to let her go out with her friends. Unsupervised time has to be earned as well.</p><p></p><p>Are there any other issues that make you think there might be more than just typical teen behavior? You mentioned that she's been a "complex character" since she was around 7. Can you explain more of what you've been seeing since way back then? Could she be using drugs of ANY kind. If this shift in personality towards you is new, it could be drugs but not necessarily. I ask because it is common.</p><p></p><p>Welcome to our little corner of the world. Others will be along but week-ends around here tend to be a little slower. Check back often. You can also try reading through the archives and see if anything there sounds helpful to you.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="TeDo, post: 507448"] Wow...I am sorry she's treating you this way. You're being such a good dad by trying to find ways to help her. For the food, I'd say keep ALL "junk" food locked up tight or don't buy any. If she doesn't DO anything around the house she shouldn't be given any money or access to anything that costs money, ie cell phone, computer, television, movies, fees for activities, ANYTHING. I have just had to teach my 13 year olds this lesson. Those things cost money so if you can't take care of your responsibilities, you don't get to have the privileges. I had to remind them that the law only requires me to provide access to food (nowhere does it say this includes junk food), adequate shelter, and health care. Nowhere does it say I have to wash laundry that isn't where it should be or pay the fee to play soccer or go to Boy Scouts or even to pay for cable, internet, and cellular service. Those are all privileges that have to be earned. If she insists on doing nothing, she gets nothing. That's how I have been dealing with the "typical teen" stuff. Showing respect to others int he house also falls under the responsibilities. Nowhere does it say I have to let her go out with her friends. Unsupervised time has to be earned as well. Are there any other issues that make you think there might be more than just typical teen behavior? You mentioned that she's been a "complex character" since she was around 7. Can you explain more of what you've been seeing since way back then? Could she be using drugs of ANY kind. If this shift in personality towards you is new, it could be drugs but not necessarily. I ask because it is common. Welcome to our little corner of the world. Others will be along but week-ends around here tend to be a little slower. Check back often. You can also try reading through the archives and see if anything there sounds helpful to you. [/QUOTE]
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Possible ODD in my 16 year old. Wher to start?
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