rebelson, I am sorry that you are hurting. It is so hard to watch your beloved son struggle with substance abuse. darkwing gave you some great insight. It is time to let go of trying to fix your son. You can't do it. He has to.
What you can do is help yourself. Go to a therapist. Start attending AlAnon or NarAnon meetings on a regular basis. Another good one is Families Anonymous. Listening to others with the same struggles can be enlightening. Listen to what helped them.
When I went to a Families Anonymous meeting, every parent there told my husband and I that their children didn't start getting better until they had completely detached from the situation. One told me that her son lived in a tent for three months but is doing well now. I didn't believe it at the time but it is true. It wasn't until my husband and I learned to set boundaries that my daughter got serious about her recovery.
I even had to cut off contact for a while until I learned how to detach with love. I struggled with that for a long time.
Please don't let your son's addiction destroy your life, too. It is possible to have a happy, fulfilling life even when your child struggles with addiction. You are two separate people who make your own choices.
Keep posting here, too. We truly understand what you are going through. We have all walked that path.
~Kathy