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Power struggles
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<blockquote data-quote="Tanya M" data-source="post: 753414" data-attributes="member: 18516"><p>Even though your daughter is on medication does not negate the fact that she can still manipulate you. Yes, you are most definitely in a power struggle with her. I think it's great that she has some chores. If she is going to live in your home rent free then she needs to do something to aid in the upkeep of the home. This is where clear and defined boundaries are a must. Good for you in standing firm and not giving into her. Always bear in mind that if she can get you to bend to her will just once, she will continue to try and get you to do more and more for her. Your expectation of her doing some cleaning is very reasonable.</p><p></p><p></p><p>GOOD!! You have every right to check her room. It's your house not hers. She is simply borrowing the bedroom while she stays in YOUR home. </p><p></p><p></p><p>Again, your daughter is an adult and you are allowing her to stay in your home. She really has no expectation of privacy. Considering what she has put you through, I understand why you peeked at the diary. However, you can never let on to her that you did that and I don't think I would make a habit of it. </p><p>Now, you say she locked her room before leaving. The only way I would allow an adult child to lock a room in my house is if they were paying rent and abiding by all house rules. </p><p>When and where did the lock on the room she's staying in come into play?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Tanya M, post: 753414, member: 18516"] Even though your daughter is on medication does not negate the fact that she can still manipulate you. Yes, you are most definitely in a power struggle with her. I think it's great that she has some chores. If she is going to live in your home rent free then she needs to do something to aid in the upkeep of the home. This is where clear and defined boundaries are a must. Good for you in standing firm and not giving into her. Always bear in mind that if she can get you to bend to her will just once, she will continue to try and get you to do more and more for her. Your expectation of her doing some cleaning is very reasonable. GOOD!! You have every right to check her room. It's your house not hers. She is simply borrowing the bedroom while she stays in YOUR home. Again, your daughter is an adult and you are allowing her to stay in your home. She really has no expectation of privacy. Considering what she has put you through, I understand why you peeked at the diary. However, you can never let on to her that you did that and I don't think I would make a habit of it. Now, you say she locked her room before leaving. The only way I would allow an adult child to lock a room in my house is if they were paying rent and abiding by all house rules. When and where did the lock on the room she's staying in come into play? [/QUOTE]
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