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Putting 12 yo difficult child into Hospital
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<blockquote data-quote="WSM" data-source="post: 276370" data-attributes="member: 5169"><p>So difficult child calls husband tonight from the psychiatric hospital. They talk about 10 minutes, in that time difficult child says he doesn't want to come home. husband said, tell the nurse that, tell the psychiatrist that. </p><p> </p><p>husband is so sad. I tried to reassure him. One of the things the therapist said is that difficult child is trying to throw out his problems by throwing out objects like his shoes and uniforms and toys and everyone else's things. He attaches his anger or anxiety or jealousy to an object and then tosses it or hides it and it reduces his negative feelings. FOr a time. THen he has to do it again.</p><p> </p><p>So I told my husband that if he 'throws out' you, the person he's attached most of his anger and negative feelings for and me the one he so resents, and his sister of whom he is so jealous, he's doing the same thing, thinking he can solve his problems.</p><p> </p><p>WHen his problems aren't solved, given a few months, he'll want to come back, he'll want to reestablish a relationship. </p><p> </p><p>husband appreciated hearing it, 'it's not you, it's just an immature solution he's trying before facing his real problems, it's not you, it's not really you, it's not you at all,' but he says of course, it still doesn't feel good to hear his son doesn't want to come home. </p><p> </p><p>So we'll see what happens.</p><p> </p><p>How many people like phosps better than home? (maybe also he feels at home there, like he doesn't have to pretend so hard to be normal, and knows he belongs there?)</p><p> </p><p>PS...he's not having any side effects from the depakote, not even sluggishness or tireness. He feels great on it. He's been on since 5/21.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="WSM, post: 276370, member: 5169"] So difficult child calls husband tonight from the psychiatric hospital. They talk about 10 minutes, in that time difficult child says he doesn't want to come home. husband said, tell the nurse that, tell the psychiatrist that. husband is so sad. I tried to reassure him. One of the things the therapist said is that difficult child is trying to throw out his problems by throwing out objects like his shoes and uniforms and toys and everyone else's things. He attaches his anger or anxiety or jealousy to an object and then tosses it or hides it and it reduces his negative feelings. FOr a time. THen he has to do it again. So I told my husband that if he 'throws out' you, the person he's attached most of his anger and negative feelings for and me the one he so resents, and his sister of whom he is so jealous, he's doing the same thing, thinking he can solve his problems. WHen his problems aren't solved, given a few months, he'll want to come back, he'll want to reestablish a relationship. husband appreciated hearing it, 'it's not you, it's just an immature solution he's trying before facing his real problems, it's not you, it's not really you, it's not you at all,' but he says of course, it still doesn't feel good to hear his son doesn't want to come home. So we'll see what happens. How many people like phosps better than home? (maybe also he feels at home there, like he doesn't have to pretend so hard to be normal, and knows he belongs there?) PS...he's not having any side effects from the depakote, not even sluggishness or tireness. He feels great on it. He's been on since 5/21. [/QUOTE]
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