Call me silly, but through all this I have thought about how many people we know who grew up with serious problems are still maintaining loving family relationships and working. Much worse things than adoption by parents who adore them.
I am talking about people who grew up with physical and sexual abuse. Father's or mothers who tell them they are nothing. People who had or have cancer and some still going through treatments. People who grew up witnessing domestic abuse.
Of course these issues cause problems, as does adoption, but most people who had it very tough work, have good family relationships, think about others etc.
Kay was adopted but she was treated well by us. There is no excuse for how she treats us or deliberately underachieves. How do we "understand" our beloved kids acting this way when many who have had it much worse still care about other people.
I no longer consider inner pain as an acceptable reason to abuse those who love them the most or to refuse to work. I don't care anymore why Kay is like she is. She won't get help to get better. Her behavior and lack of resources belong to her. Just her.
I am so over understanding Kay and feeling sorry for her. It's not the end of the world to be adopted by loving people. If somebody thinks it is that bad, don't abuse others or demand help. See a psychiatrist. We would help Kay pay for that and she knows it.
There is no excuse to live the way no matter what a person went through.
God's blessings to all.
