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raging
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<blockquote data-quote="Malika" data-source="post: 532245" data-attributes="member: 11227"><p>I guess... she is not able to "control" the rage when it is happening. I like the idea of the hug, if it would work, and I know various people suggest this in these kind of rages. She must herself feel quite scared by her intense emotions. I wanted to see if J did this when he was younger (couldn't remember clearly) and so looked up in the book I wrote occasional notes about him from when I first met him at a week old. Here is something from when he was 2: "He is dynamically energetic, boisterous, physical, sociable, very likeable and charming but with frequent episodes of aggression and intense rage when angered or upset. Cannot tolerate frustration although speaking to him gently and with explanation seems to help calm him."</p><p>I reproduce this because it seems to me that he basically has the same issues now, as if the personality and behaviour set down very early is actually a real marker of what is to come. I say this not to depress you obviously, but just as a way of saying maybe Sugar Pea's raging needs to be taken seriously - which you are doing. I don't know whether it helps her to put her in a kind of time out - I am sure it does not harm her as much as all sorts of things you could be doing. Maybe try the being very calm and gentle and hugging her approach, as if she is not being deliberately wilful but is manifesting some behaviour that is beyond her to control? Oh gosh, Easier Said Than Done, I know all too well!!!</p><p>You are such a warrior parent and an example of caring and commitment to your children.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Malika, post: 532245, member: 11227"] I guess... she is not able to "control" the rage when it is happening. I like the idea of the hug, if it would work, and I know various people suggest this in these kind of rages. She must herself feel quite scared by her intense emotions. I wanted to see if J did this when he was younger (couldn't remember clearly) and so looked up in the book I wrote occasional notes about him from when I first met him at a week old. Here is something from when he was 2: "He is dynamically energetic, boisterous, physical, sociable, very likeable and charming but with frequent episodes of aggression and intense rage when angered or upset. Cannot tolerate frustration although speaking to him gently and with explanation seems to help calm him." I reproduce this because it seems to me that he basically has the same issues now, as if the personality and behaviour set down very early is actually a real marker of what is to come. I say this not to depress you obviously, but just as a way of saying maybe Sugar Pea's raging needs to be taken seriously - which you are doing. I don't know whether it helps her to put her in a kind of time out - I am sure it does not harm her as much as all sorts of things you could be doing. Maybe try the being very calm and gentle and hugging her approach, as if she is not being deliberately wilful but is manifesting some behaviour that is beyond her to control? Oh gosh, Easier Said Than Done, I know all too well!!! You are such a warrior parent and an example of caring and commitment to your children. [/QUOTE]
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