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Re: Please Tell me we are not alone..
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<blockquote data-quote="Mattsmom277" data-source="post: 374859" data-attributes="member: 4264"><p>Welcome and not alot of time tonight to add a long response but wanted to say hi and welcome to the group.</p><p></p><p>I wanted to say also that when kids are younger, as mentioned it is common (you sure notice it here on the boards) for it to be a real problem to get a formal diagnosis in younger children. </p><p></p><p>I learned the hard way that when a professional who COULD help got stuck on a lack of ability to find a formal diagnosis (a "label" or "Category"), I often got the support that was really important when I would then say "OKay, child is young so that makes sense. In the end it is simply a label to summarize the root cause of the behaviours. In absence of a label, I still believe we can actively treat the BEHAVIORS and problems as other kids would get treated WITH a formal diagnosis. "Like" behaviours usually respond to "like" treatments, therefore using only behaviors, what can we do to offer some assistance and help to my child. Surely a absence of ability to put a formal name to the problem isn't grounds to exclude a plan to treat my childs very real problems. Some professionals don't see past a diagnosis. So bringing them subtly back to earth, backing them into a corner perse, can often help. Ultimately we all just want support and advice and ideas of how to approach the particular problems. And a diagnosis often changes for most of the diagnosis'ed children (here on the board) anyhow over the years. The treatments always remain the same (other than medications) for the most part, if the behaviors are properly analyzed and a proper approach to treatment is put into place. </p><p></p><p>This won't be a instant help to any of you new to the problems that can be had when seeking professional help. But over time it can be a great wisdom to have from the get go. These professionals also see so many kids with issues every day, so they also see all kinds of parents. Some parents must drive them nuts, fixated on normal behaviours that they believe are some dreaded diagnosis. Or parents whose parenting approach is causing the problems, not any diagnosis of a child. I think some get jaded. So it can really help to present as a parent on the very first meeting, that is focused on practical solutions to specific problems. And if in the process someone finds a diagnosis, terrific! But that in absence of one, as a parent you are seeking SOLUTIONS to behaviors and expect that in their role, they have something to offer.</p><p></p><p>Hang in there, and I'm glad you found us. This place is a life saver in the darkest time, light relief when needed (lots of laughs grouped in with the serious posts), and invaluable support.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Mattsmom277, post: 374859, member: 4264"] Welcome and not alot of time tonight to add a long response but wanted to say hi and welcome to the group. I wanted to say also that when kids are younger, as mentioned it is common (you sure notice it here on the boards) for it to be a real problem to get a formal diagnosis in younger children. I learned the hard way that when a professional who COULD help got stuck on a lack of ability to find a formal diagnosis (a "label" or "Category"), I often got the support that was really important when I would then say "OKay, child is young so that makes sense. In the end it is simply a label to summarize the root cause of the behaviours. In absence of a label, I still believe we can actively treat the BEHAVIORS and problems as other kids would get treated WITH a formal diagnosis. "Like" behaviours usually respond to "like" treatments, therefore using only behaviors, what can we do to offer some assistance and help to my child. Surely a absence of ability to put a formal name to the problem isn't grounds to exclude a plan to treat my childs very real problems. Some professionals don't see past a diagnosis. So bringing them subtly back to earth, backing them into a corner perse, can often help. Ultimately we all just want support and advice and ideas of how to approach the particular problems. And a diagnosis often changes for most of the diagnosis'ed children (here on the board) anyhow over the years. The treatments always remain the same (other than medications) for the most part, if the behaviors are properly analyzed and a proper approach to treatment is put into place. This won't be a instant help to any of you new to the problems that can be had when seeking professional help. But over time it can be a great wisdom to have from the get go. These professionals also see so many kids with issues every day, so they also see all kinds of parents. Some parents must drive them nuts, fixated on normal behaviours that they believe are some dreaded diagnosis. Or parents whose parenting approach is causing the problems, not any diagnosis of a child. I think some get jaded. So it can really help to present as a parent on the very first meeting, that is focused on practical solutions to specific problems. And if in the process someone finds a diagnosis, terrific! But that in absence of one, as a parent you are seeking SOLUTIONS to behaviors and expect that in their role, they have something to offer. Hang in there, and I'm glad you found us. This place is a life saver in the darkest time, light relief when needed (lots of laughs grouped in with the serious posts), and invaluable support. [/QUOTE]
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