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<blockquote data-quote="PatriotsGirl" data-source="post: 445519"><p>I am going to give you advice based on what I have seen lately and learned...</p><p></p><p>Let me ask you this. What reason do they have to change? What reason do they have to get a job? They have a roof over their head, food in their belly and they are allowed to do what ever they want. What motivation do they have to get off their butts and provide for themselves? None. And look what it is doing to you. Nothing and I mean nothing will change until they are forced to. They are over 18 - buh bye. Burned bridges? Shame. Time to figure it out. </p><p></p><p>My difficult child has been out six months and already I see that she has figured out how to clean up after herself (her room used to be the same way - TRASHED), she says thank you for everything, she is not afraid of physical labor to earn money, and she knows she should be thankful when someone puts a roof over her head. Now if she would just agree to go to rehab and sober living I would be thrilled!! But, she hasn't, and so I stand firm until she does. </p><p></p><p>You need to stand firm, too. Let natural consequences do their job and take care of you.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="PatriotsGirl, post: 445519"] I am going to give you advice based on what I have seen lately and learned... Let me ask you this. What reason do they have to change? What reason do they have to get a job? They have a roof over their head, food in their belly and they are allowed to do what ever they want. What motivation do they have to get off their butts and provide for themselves? None. And look what it is doing to you. Nothing and I mean nothing will change until they are forced to. They are over 18 - buh bye. Burned bridges? Shame. Time to figure it out. My difficult child has been out six months and already I see that she has figured out how to clean up after herself (her room used to be the same way - TRASHED), she says thank you for everything, she is not afraid of physical labor to earn money, and she knows she should be thankful when someone puts a roof over her head. Now if she would just agree to go to rehab and sober living I would be thrilled!! But, she hasn't, and so I stand firm until she does. You need to stand firm, too. Let natural consequences do their job and take care of you. [/QUOTE]
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