Like so many I have been there done that. It's exhausting and worst of all (for me) was that I really didn't see any light at the end of the tunnel. I agree with everyone else. None of us every imagined the life that we had to live. Sigh!
I'm not sure if you have any "sitter" money available but most of us know that finding a good sitter is beyond challenging when you have difficult child's. One thing that helped me was hiring a sitter for just one of the difficult children at a time. It turned out that if I found a teen sitter to take one to the park or to the movies or whatever for a couple of hours, the difficult child left at home rarely caused me problems one on one. It was like a win/win. The kid who had the turn going somewhere felt special and behaved accordingly. The kid who had me didn't have a sibling to stir up and often ended up being good company. I can tell you truthfully that it helped me get over negative feelings as well. Hang in there. Hugs DDD
