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Parent Emeritus
Regret vs Guilt
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<blockquote data-quote="Acacia" data-source="post: 761794" data-attributes="member: 19832"><p>Pia Mellody talks about disempowering abuse and empowering abuse. Disempowering abuse of children includes neglect, physical, emotional, sexual abuse. Empowering abuse of children is failing to set limits and boundaries. This is what happened with my now 36 year old son. When my son was 9-15, my ex didn't set limits, allowed my son to break rules at school, gave into him, etc. with no negative consequences. Basically he enabled my son to become oppositional and a narcissist. </p><p></p><p>Nomad, thank for the info about FA.</p><p></p><p>Laura, I hope you are doing okay. I know I can stand firm in the moment, and then the guilt, heartbreak, and sadness creep in. You are are a loving mother trying to help your son and you are loving to yourself by setting a boundary when you were treated badly.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Acacia, post: 761794, member: 19832"] Pia Mellody talks about disempowering abuse and empowering abuse. Disempowering abuse of children includes neglect, physical, emotional, sexual abuse. Empowering abuse of children is failing to set limits and boundaries. This is what happened with my now 36 year old son. When my son was 9-15, my ex didn't set limits, allowed my son to break rules at school, gave into him, etc. with no negative consequences. Basically he enabled my son to become oppositional and a narcissist. Nomad, thank for the info about FA. Laura, I hope you are doing okay. I know I can stand firm in the moment, and then the guilt, heartbreak, and sadness creep in. You are are a loving mother trying to help your son and you are loving to yourself by setting a boundary when you were treated badly. [/QUOTE]
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