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<blockquote data-quote="klmno" data-source="post: 247929" data-attributes="member: 3699"><p>This is already what they are doing-</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>My son has taken hinges off doors that were locked by exterior locks. He has broken kitchen utensils to have something that could stab someone. My cigs were locked in the trunk of the car and I was keeping my keys on me and sleeping with them. He's in a secure place now and has cut with a piece of plastic broken off a laundry basket, a broken piece of a radio antenna, and a piece of laminate finish off a countertop. He has said he can cut with a piece of paper or a toilet tissue roll if need be. He has physically taken keys out of my pocket and was last arrested for putting a knife near my throat. Yes, I can (and have) call the police. The more that is done, the more likely he ends up in state juvy. Right now, the attny's are fighting to keep him out but instead of concentrating on ways to get him in Residential Treatment Center (RTC) as recommended and I've been asking for, now they are concentrating on me again. Never mind that his cutting has gotten worse since he's been out of home. OK, it appears that gal would be fine with difficult child going to Residential Treatment Center (RTC) if the county could fund it, but now po has gotten this new ca thinking that maybe i'm the problem- because the po does not want to advocate for Residential Treatment Center (RTC) and the county is highly unlikely to pay for it.</p><p></p><p>In Jan, he was tdo'd after calling cops for him becoming aggressive with me. This was after an earlier meeting with PO that day- after I had called and asked her if we could postpone it due to a great amount of stress and tension and she said no, we had to go. My son has told his therapist how he can't stand being on probation with no end in sight. There are no rules or guidelines or time limits on his probation. I can't stand the way she tries to play family therapist and other stuff she says that causes problems between me and difficult child and greatly increases our stress level. The day of the last incident was after I'd been to courts and resquested to speak to a dss worker about temporary relief of custody and I had come home and talke to difficult child about it. I did that because po was doing nothing to address the real problems that I was telling everyone in county we needed help with and then her super told me that he thought all difficult child's problems were my fault and difficult child wouldn't do school work or anything. I am not letting difficult child come home until this is resolved. He knows I love him, the place he is now knows I'm trying to be a participant in his treatment, in any way they suggest, and I visit and provide for difficult child. But if they (PO or gal or anyone) is going to claim that maybe this is why difficult child is still cutting, then I will stop that. </p><p></p><p>If these people stay in my life, I will be a continuous emotional, stressed-out basket case. If he is living somewhere else and does better, than it is the right decision. Never mind that it could have something to do with the fact that po will back off if he's somewhere ellse- and chances are he wouldn't be in this jurisdiction anyway. If he doesn't improve, I will at least be able to advocate for him then and hopefully, they will be more willing to listen or at least consider that maybe he has issues that are not resulting from where he's living.</p><p></p><p>As far as the psychiatric evaluation- most tdocs don't even have experience in what I went to therapy for. There is no way I can "pass" one by our people in the county mental health dept who know the PO and mst guy. I'll concede on that one. Now, does throwing me in jail help them deal with the problem of where to send difficult child?</p><p></p><p>I can't afford an attny. I couldn't find a pro bono one for difficult child so I doubt very seriously that I could find a pro bono one for myself- I haven't even been charged for anything.</p><p></p><p>Furthermore- they ought to be thinking about what kind of message it would send difficult child to know that he put this knife at my neck, demanded cigs, got arrested, then ended up back home with a therapist coming over 3 times a week to tell his mom what she needs to change and seeing a po who's sitting there agreeing with difficult child that i'm just over protective so she's going to sit there and order my parental decisions. Oh, Hellooooo NO. And I am an enabler?</p><p></p><p>Remember- the county meeting a month ago where they said they would send an in-home but that's it- which I'm sure was based on PO- and I said what if I put him in parental placement with dss and dss said if I did, they would put difficult child wherever they wanted. And I said, well if I don't, where are you going to put difficult child if he puts a knife in my throat 2 weeks from now. And of course, that would be state juvy. Then, less than a week later, difficult child had a knife at my neck demanding cigs. So now, they are considering state juvy or back home with in home therapist. Uh HUH.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="klmno, post: 247929, member: 3699"] This is already what they are doing- My son has taken hinges off doors that were locked by exterior locks. He has broken kitchen utensils to have something that could stab someone. My cigs were locked in the trunk of the car and I was keeping my keys on me and sleeping with them. He's in a secure place now and has cut with a piece of plastic broken off a laundry basket, a broken piece of a radio antenna, and a piece of laminate finish off a countertop. He has said he can cut with a piece of paper or a toilet tissue roll if need be. He has physically taken keys out of my pocket and was last arrested for putting a knife near my throat. Yes, I can (and have) call the police. The more that is done, the more likely he ends up in state juvy. Right now, the attny's are fighting to keep him out but instead of concentrating on ways to get him in Residential Treatment Center (RTC) as recommended and I've been asking for, now they are concentrating on me again. Never mind that his cutting has gotten worse since he's been out of home. OK, it appears that gal would be fine with difficult child going to Residential Treatment Center (RTC) if the county could fund it, but now po has gotten this new ca thinking that maybe i'm the problem- because the po does not want to advocate for Residential Treatment Center (RTC) and the county is highly unlikely to pay for it. In Jan, he was tdo'd after calling cops for him becoming aggressive with me. This was after an earlier meeting with PO that day- after I had called and asked her if we could postpone it due to a great amount of stress and tension and she said no, we had to go. My son has told his therapist how he can't stand being on probation with no end in sight. There are no rules or guidelines or time limits on his probation. I can't stand the way she tries to play family therapist and other stuff she says that causes problems between me and difficult child and greatly increases our stress level. The day of the last incident was after I'd been to courts and resquested to speak to a dss worker about temporary relief of custody and I had come home and talke to difficult child about it. I did that because po was doing nothing to address the real problems that I was telling everyone in county we needed help with and then her super told me that he thought all difficult child's problems were my fault and difficult child wouldn't do school work or anything. I am not letting difficult child come home until this is resolved. He knows I love him, the place he is now knows I'm trying to be a participant in his treatment, in any way they suggest, and I visit and provide for difficult child. But if they (PO or gal or anyone) is going to claim that maybe this is why difficult child is still cutting, then I will stop that. If these people stay in my life, I will be a continuous emotional, stressed-out basket case. If he is living somewhere else and does better, than it is the right decision. Never mind that it could have something to do with the fact that po will back off if he's somewhere ellse- and chances are he wouldn't be in this jurisdiction anyway. If he doesn't improve, I will at least be able to advocate for him then and hopefully, they will be more willing to listen or at least consider that maybe he has issues that are not resulting from where he's living. As far as the psychiatric evaluation- most tdocs don't even have experience in what I went to therapy for. There is no way I can "pass" one by our people in the county mental health dept who know the PO and mst guy. I'll concede on that one. Now, does throwing me in jail help them deal with the problem of where to send difficult child? I can't afford an attny. I couldn't find a pro bono one for difficult child so I doubt very seriously that I could find a pro bono one for myself- I haven't even been charged for anything. Furthermore- they ought to be thinking about what kind of message it would send difficult child to know that he put this knife at my neck, demanded cigs, got arrested, then ended up back home with a therapist coming over 3 times a week to tell his mom what she needs to change and seeing a po who's sitting there agreeing with difficult child that i'm just over protective so she's going to sit there and order my parental decisions. Oh, Hellooooo NO. And I am an enabler? Remember- the county meeting a month ago where they said they would send an in-home but that's it- which I'm sure was based on PO- and I said what if I put him in parental placement with dss and dss said if I did, they would put difficult child wherever they wanted. And I said, well if I don't, where are you going to put difficult child if he puts a knife in my throat 2 weeks from now. And of course, that would be state juvy. Then, less than a week later, difficult child had a knife at my neck demanding cigs. So now, they are considering state juvy or back home with in home therapist. Uh HUH. [/QUOTE]
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