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<blockquote data-quote="RN0441" data-source="post: 726104" data-attributes="member: 15032"><p>LBL</p><p></p><p>I totally understand the feeling of being cheated out of enjoying being a parent. It's not what it's supposed to be like with our youngest either.</p><p></p><p>We both had children from our first marriages when we met. When we married I wanted to have one of our own so he would be related to all of us. Had I known that this is what we had in our future, obviously I may not have wanted one more. He was such a beautiful and loved child and I thought he was really going to outshine the older two. He had so much going for him. Until he didn't. My signature tells the rest.</p><p></p><p>I don't think there is one parent here who doesn't feel ripped off or cheated from what we thought it would be like.</p><p></p><p>My son is in a wonderful program now and I do have hope for a good outcome. However the day we landed in Florida he called and it was the addict talking again. He was negative, demanding and just not the person I wanted him to be. I was very strong and restated my boundaries with him. I have learned a lot.</p><p></p><p>I ended up with a ginormous cold sore the next day from the stress of that conversation. I then told my husband I was taking a break and next time he could do the talking. I was PISSED! He said no, that we both need to be supportive. He is young and maybe he was just having a bad day etc. He did call Christmas to wish us a Merry Christmas and he sounded like his old (new) self so I was relieved. </p><p></p><p>He then sent us a beautiful letter and touched on many things that I had not heard him say before. I feel that after 11 more months in the program and moving to a new town he will have the best possible chance of making it stick this time. </p><p></p><p>Don't try to figure out what happens after rehab LBL. There is a lot of time between now and then and you don't need to concern yourself with that right now. Save your energy!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="RN0441, post: 726104, member: 15032"] LBL I totally understand the feeling of being cheated out of enjoying being a parent. It's not what it's supposed to be like with our youngest either. We both had children from our first marriages when we met. When we married I wanted to have one of our own so he would be related to all of us. Had I known that this is what we had in our future, obviously I may not have wanted one more. He was such a beautiful and loved child and I thought he was really going to outshine the older two. He had so much going for him. Until he didn't. My signature tells the rest. I don't think there is one parent here who doesn't feel ripped off or cheated from what we thought it would be like. My son is in a wonderful program now and I do have hope for a good outcome. However the day we landed in Florida he called and it was the addict talking again. He was negative, demanding and just not the person I wanted him to be. I was very strong and restated my boundaries with him. I have learned a lot. I ended up with a ginormous cold sore the next day from the stress of that conversation. I then told my husband I was taking a break and next time he could do the talking. I was PISSED! He said no, that we both need to be supportive. He is young and maybe he was just having a bad day etc. He did call Christmas to wish us a Merry Christmas and he sounded like his old (new) self so I was relieved. He then sent us a beautiful letter and touched on many things that I had not heard him say before. I feel that after 11 more months in the program and moving to a new town he will have the best possible chance of making it stick this time. Don't try to figure out what happens after rehab LBL. There is a lot of time between now and then and you don't need to concern yourself with that right now. Save your energy! [/QUOTE]
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