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General Parenting
sad --no call from difficult child tonight
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<blockquote data-quote="DammitJanet" data-source="post: 356658" data-attributes="member: 1514"><p>Mog, you really need to detach your feelings from what he is going through. Even though he may be upset, sad or having a bad day doesnt mean it has to effect your emotional life. He has done this to himself and he has to get through it.</p><p></p><p>I cant tell you how many of our kids will/or have chosen the harder path in life and wont experience all the normal things we wanted them to experience. No proms, no graduation walks, no graduation parties, kids out of wedlock, college is just a dream, jail, probation or parole. Its just life for us. We hope that things will turn around and it can. There are several parents here who are a testament to that. </p><p></p><p>But parents have to start detaching and not being codependent on their parent-child relationship. Its not good for either of you. I used to be so enmeshed in my son's problems that if he was having a bad day, I couldnt be happy at all. My moods completely revolved around his. It was crazy. Now, well, I am not thrilled if he makes a stupid decision but it is all on him and I am going to live my life no matter what he does. He is not taking me down with him.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DammitJanet, post: 356658, member: 1514"] Mog, you really need to detach your feelings from what he is going through. Even though he may be upset, sad or having a bad day doesnt mean it has to effect your emotional life. He has done this to himself and he has to get through it. I cant tell you how many of our kids will/or have chosen the harder path in life and wont experience all the normal things we wanted them to experience. No proms, no graduation walks, no graduation parties, kids out of wedlock, college is just a dream, jail, probation or parole. Its just life for us. We hope that things will turn around and it can. There are several parents here who are a testament to that. But parents have to start detaching and not being codependent on their parent-child relationship. Its not good for either of you. I used to be so enmeshed in my son's problems that if he was having a bad day, I couldnt be happy at all. My moods completely revolved around his. It was crazy. Now, well, I am not thrilled if he makes a stupid decision but it is all on him and I am going to live my life no matter what he does. He is not taking me down with him. [/QUOTE]
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sad --no call from difficult child tonight
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