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Sad tonight
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<blockquote data-quote="Zardo" data-source="post: 579440" data-attributes="member: 12490"><p>Update - difficult child raged today when he realized that the car keys are gone. We had planned to talk to him tonight, but you know - best laid plans.... So - he was furious. Luckily I was at work. When I got home, he asked to talk about it. I said no becauase "you know how you get - I won't talk until Dad's here" He insisted respectfully and promised to remain respectful. We ended up having a very impactful talk. He admitted that the things I found are his but that they are from before IOP. He said he was in a very bad place and he doesn't want to discuss it as he's too ashamed. He said he stopped everything but weed as soon as IOP began 2 months ago and clean of weed for at least a month and that he is really trying to change. He said he's sure I don't believe him, he wouldn't believe him and that that is the source of his frustration. He's trying hard and no one cares, everyone is suspicious of him. I told him it's hard to believe him when we constantly find things around the house - he agreed. He and I agreed that step one is to TOTALLY clean out his room and the car - getting rid of anything and everything from his using life. He offerred to take an at-home drug test and said the THC should be totally gone by now. I told him that would be a very big step in the right direction of him earning trust. He knows he doesn't have the car right now. Our home counselor suggested telling him that we will take him up on his home test offer and if/when it's totally clean, he can drive. He talked about school and how he is going to turn things around this quarter - he even sat down at a desk doing school work this afternoon. I feel like the terrible night has turned into a day with hope....we'll see - I have been here before - hoping he is sincere. As far as his anger goes - he acknowledged that it remains an issue. While I was at work, he threw a couple of things aroudn - mostly laundry. He apollogiezed and picked them all up. He had ruined a basket and later asked me how much they cost - said he wants to replace it because he is always breaking things in anger and he should have to replace it. We'll see....</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Zardo, post: 579440, member: 12490"] Update - difficult child raged today when he realized that the car keys are gone. We had planned to talk to him tonight, but you know - best laid plans.... So - he was furious. Luckily I was at work. When I got home, he asked to talk about it. I said no becauase "you know how you get - I won't talk until Dad's here" He insisted respectfully and promised to remain respectful. We ended up having a very impactful talk. He admitted that the things I found are his but that they are from before IOP. He said he was in a very bad place and he doesn't want to discuss it as he's too ashamed. He said he stopped everything but weed as soon as IOP began 2 months ago and clean of weed for at least a month and that he is really trying to change. He said he's sure I don't believe him, he wouldn't believe him and that that is the source of his frustration. He's trying hard and no one cares, everyone is suspicious of him. I told him it's hard to believe him when we constantly find things around the house - he agreed. He and I agreed that step one is to TOTALLY clean out his room and the car - getting rid of anything and everything from his using life. He offerred to take an at-home drug test and said the THC should be totally gone by now. I told him that would be a very big step in the right direction of him earning trust. He knows he doesn't have the car right now. Our home counselor suggested telling him that we will take him up on his home test offer and if/when it's totally clean, he can drive. He talked about school and how he is going to turn things around this quarter - he even sat down at a desk doing school work this afternoon. I feel like the terrible night has turned into a day with hope....we'll see - I have been here before - hoping he is sincere. As far as his anger goes - he acknowledged that it remains an issue. While I was at work, he threw a couple of things aroudn - mostly laundry. He apollogiezed and picked them all up. He had ruined a basket and later asked me how much they cost - said he wants to replace it because he is always breaking things in anger and he should have to replace it. We'll see.... [/QUOTE]
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