SD Class

[wakeupcall]

Today husband and I went to visit another school campus where the school district has social development classes. IF difficult child were to transfer, this is where he would attend. We loved it! There are five students with one teacher and two aids. difficult child would love the attention. The biggest problem is that it's so late in the school year, that I doubt its effectiveness in such a short period of time AND difficult child's reaction to changing schools now and then again in the fall when he has a natural transition to intermediate school. How does a parent ever know the right thing to do?

 

[Martie]

You do not ever know; you just have to trust your gut.

What will happen next year? If a fifth grade student needs a placement with almost a 1:1 ratio of adults to students, he is very unlikely o be able to manage included in a typical middle school which is a brutal experience for many, including some PCs.

IF you like this placement, the relevant question is, "Can he go there next year, too?" If the answer is, "No," then what is the plan for next year? I would suggest you look at the equivalent program for middle schoolers to see if you are favorably impressed with it, also. If no such program exists, then I think you have a larger problem than whether to go or stay this year.

Martie

 

[dreamer]

this is JMHO from my own experience ......so please take it for what it's worth.
Our school moved my dtr to a very small self contained program for 8th grade. When it was time to move to HS they pulled her out of the small classroom and fully expected her to be able to totally mainstream into the huge high school with no help and no problems, becuz in their mind, I guess? they "solved" her "problems" by having her in the small 8th grade classroom. Nothing could have been further from the truth at all.
Seems to me each level they move up- the classes are larger the expectations higher, but if they spend any amount of time in a seperate class or school, and get used to the very intimate setting, it can be that much more difficult to jump back in.
I agree with Martie, what is the plan for middle school, what is available? Maybe Martie might have diff reasons than I have, but..it is an important thing to check into.
Good luck.

 

[wakeupcall]

There's no doubt whatsoever that difficult child will go into the sd class in the intermediate school in the fall. I also have no doubt that he NEEDS it. The SD class now works very hard to mainstream (as they should), but they always have the safety net of the sd class should they feel overwhelmed (which difficult child often does). When we visited today the teacher said that he felt like if difficult child was in the sd class for the rest of this school year, that the sd class in the intermediate school would be less daunting. My gut thinks we should give it a go, but I'm not sure how husband feels. He promptly went back to the office and we agreed we'd each think about it all afternoon and discuss it this evening. Thanks for your input.

 

[Sheila]

I'm glad the placement looks like a good potential.

A mom's instincts are usually good. Go with them.

 

[wakeupcall]

After sleeping on it, I think we need to go to the intermediate school and check out the SD class there. IF we agree to sd classes on his IEP/BIP now, then he will most assuredly be there in the fall in a new school as a sixth grader. We're so torn as to what to do .. one side of us thinks that the school is out to get him, the other side thinks they really do want to help and get him on the right track. I STILL hate the way we were railroaded, though, and makes me wonder WHY they felt the need for eight of them to explain it to us unless they suspected our opposition.

 

[Martie]

I would check out the middle school class--perhaps at different times of the day on different days (try a Friday afternoon after lunch--as well as an early in the week morning)

I would never let a SD off for its motives unless parents were SURE that the intention is benign; however, SDs almost ALWAYS load their meetings so any parents feel outnumbered. Therefore, I wouldn't read too much into this.

The important thing is what is going to happen in middle school. It is a very crucial time in the life of a difficult child--either a chance to improve for middle/late adolescence, or go the other way. I don't mean to make you more anxious, but through all of these posts, I have been focused on the middle school experience for a reason--both professionally and been there done that.

Martie

 

[wakeupcall]

Martie, I think you're right and I've also already told husband that I think we need to go to the intermediate school just like we did the other campus yesterday. On the other hand, I think that they can force the issue and we may not have a say so when it gets to the bottom line. I just spoke to difficult child's therapist and he thinks it's probably a good idea. If he would regress, he would help get him back on track from his end. Interesting....

 

[wakeupcall]

Yesterday, husband and I very gingerly told difficult child about going to a new school this coming Fri. He cried, said he didn't want to go, then decided it wasn't a half-bad idea!! Honestly, he's doing so well with the idea I can hardly believe it's my son! We waited and waited for fireworks and it just didn't happen. Of course, one of the things we said was he wouldn't have to go to the offic anymore and he really liked that idea! One thing he did say that is sooooooooo sad, "It won't matter, no one in my class likes me anyway....." Poor difficult child...

 

[Martie]

I hope this is a positive experience for difficult child--maybe he will make a friend or two. Even one friend as a child enter adolescence can make a difference.

Martie