Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
Seeking advice/agreement about 9 yo step-daughter
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="TeDo" data-source="post: 461589"><p>Grandma sounds just like my mother. You may need to "limit" contact with grandma for a little while. Either that or tell her that she really needs to keep her opinions to herself and if she can't do that and contact with her continues to cause difficult child to act worse, you will eliminate contact altogether. Right now, Grandma is only going to "undo" everything you do. Since she is narrow-minded and opinionated and verbalizes all this, she is going to confuse your poor daughter. You need an ally, not an adversary and your daughter needs consistency, not an enabler that encourages the behavior. Not contact would be better than that.</p><p></p><p>Everything you are describing about your daughter is a lot of the stuff I dealt with from my son. He officially carried the ODD diagnosis for 4 years only to find out he wasn't being oppositional or defiant intentionally. He was actually on the autism spectrum. Everything about the way he was treated when the diagnosis was ODD was extremely counterproductive. I (and the school) ended up causing more harm than good. I have changed the way I "teach" difficult child instead of punishing. I can't teach if I don't know WHY something is happening. I hope you keep an open mind when you read the book. IT WORKS! If it weren't for reading that book, I never would have started digging again for an "explanation" for his behavior. We never would have found the REAL reason for it.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="TeDo, post: 461589"] Grandma sounds just like my mother. You may need to "limit" contact with grandma for a little while. Either that or tell her that she really needs to keep her opinions to herself and if she can't do that and contact with her continues to cause difficult child to act worse, you will eliminate contact altogether. Right now, Grandma is only going to "undo" everything you do. Since she is narrow-minded and opinionated and verbalizes all this, she is going to confuse your poor daughter. You need an ally, not an adversary and your daughter needs consistency, not an enabler that encourages the behavior. Not contact would be better than that. Everything you are describing about your daughter is a lot of the stuff I dealt with from my son. He officially carried the ODD diagnosis for 4 years only to find out he wasn't being oppositional or defiant intentionally. He was actually on the autism spectrum. Everything about the way he was treated when the diagnosis was ODD was extremely counterproductive. I (and the school) ended up causing more harm than good. I have changed the way I "teach" difficult child instead of punishing. I can't teach if I don't know WHY something is happening. I hope you keep an open mind when you read the book. IT WORKS! If it weren't for reading that book, I never would have started digging again for an "explanation" for his behavior. We never would have found the REAL reason for it. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
Seeking advice/agreement about 9 yo step-daughter
Top