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Self destruct?
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<blockquote data-quote="Hound dog" data-source="post: 197865" data-attributes="member: 84"><p>Witz</p><p> </p><p>A few days after K took off with the kids..........I drank 5 people under the table. I started off with screwdrivers. Two actually had OJ in 2 of them. I didn't stop until I'd finished 2 5ths of the good vodka. </p><p> </p><p>My kids had never, ever seen me drink alcohol. (hadn't planned on it that night either, they were in bed) I hadn't touched the stuff in well over 16 yrs. Last time I'd had it I went into acute renal failure. Didn't care. husband was mad when I bought the vodka. Didn't care. Best friend knew it was serious because I don't drink. Didn't care.</p><p> </p><p>I'm not a crier. Most anyone sees out of me is a few tears leaking. But I knew I needed to release emotion or I was going to need to be locked up. I was halfway thru the 2nd bottle when the sobs hit. I sobbed so bad I went hoarse. They were so powerful I couldn't stand.</p><p> </p><p>It wasn't pretty. I didn't care. My family and best friend were utterly shocked. So what?</p><p> </p><p>I was able to release some of the grief that was killing me. The next morning nothing had changed, but I had. I could move forward and begin to cope. I've not touched alcohol in the 6 yrs since either. </p><p> </p><p>Sometimes, my dear friend, we just gotta do what we gotta do. Not saying you should smoke or drink or whatever. But in answer to your question.....I don't think a bit of cutting loose when it's truely needed is bad. Self destruct might not be such a grand idea. (I'd be afraid I'd never come back)</p><p> </p><p>I'm so sorry you're hurting so much. Wish I could reach right thru this screen and give you big warm hugs.</p><p> </p><p>(((hugs)))</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Hound dog, post: 197865, member: 84"] Witz A few days after K took off with the kids..........I drank 5 people under the table. I started off with screwdrivers. Two actually had OJ in 2 of them. I didn't stop until I'd finished 2 5ths of the good vodka. My kids had never, ever seen me drink alcohol. (hadn't planned on it that night either, they were in bed) I hadn't touched the stuff in well over 16 yrs. Last time I'd had it I went into acute renal failure. Didn't care. husband was mad when I bought the vodka. Didn't care. Best friend knew it was serious because I don't drink. Didn't care. I'm not a crier. Most anyone sees out of me is a few tears leaking. But I knew I needed to release emotion or I was going to need to be locked up. I was halfway thru the 2nd bottle when the sobs hit. I sobbed so bad I went hoarse. They were so powerful I couldn't stand. It wasn't pretty. I didn't care. My family and best friend were utterly shocked. So what? I was able to release some of the grief that was killing me. The next morning nothing had changed, but I had. I could move forward and begin to cope. I've not touched alcohol in the 6 yrs since either. Sometimes, my dear friend, we just gotta do what we gotta do. Not saying you should smoke or drink or whatever. But in answer to your question.....I don't think a bit of cutting loose when it's truely needed is bad. Self destruct might not be such a grand idea. (I'd be afraid I'd never come back) I'm so sorry you're hurting so much. Wish I could reach right thru this screen and give you big warm hugs. (((hugs))) [/QUOTE]
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