Shadowing was, apparently, pointless.

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Shari, Feb 25, 2009.

  1. Shari

    Shari IsItFridayYet?

    Cause they've knocked him down to half days anyway.

    I went in today to shadow difficult child and his para, like I did yesterday, and was pulled off to the side for a meeting. Despite seeing that the para could have intervened and did a very poor job and thus ticked difficult child off which resulted in him hitting her, and because he was violent again, he can't go to school all day.

    I'm perturbed.

    Besides that, during that meeting, the "sort of" para took difficult child to music, and in the 20 minutes he was in there, he fell apart and had to be put in the safe room. They told me to step back and they'd handle it.

    I waited 10 minutes and he kept screaming. I finally went to the door and just took over. I had him calm and out and back in class in another 10 minutes.

    They told me to be let him stay the rest of today so I can explain tonight why he'll be leaving early. I was his para for the rest of today and the other paras watched me. I did. We had no problems at all the rest of the afternoon.
  2. slsh

    slsh member since 1999

    Shari - I'm sorry but half days doesn't cut it in my book. They're not educating him if he's only there half a day. If they cannot handle his behaviors (or if para's aren't willing to learn *how* to deal with his behaviors), SD needs to find a more appropriate placement.

    Sorry - but it just infuriates me when they do this half-day garbage. Our kids have enough problems keeping up academically as it is, even when they're incredibly bright, because their moods/behaviors just interefere so much. They are setting your son up to fail perpetually in the school setting. Not only is there the social issue of leaving (or arriving) in the middle of the day, but there's the hardcore basic fact that 3 hours of "education" cannot possibly match 6 hours, and exactly how on earth do they think he will ever recover academically? They had best not be waiting for him to be "stabilized" because there is simply no telling when, or if, that will happen.

    I'd fight this tooth and nail. Education - equal hours as nondisabled peers, period.
  3. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    Shari, it sounds like they are only focusing on punishment for him, and acting like if they just get him to follow rules, they will have no problem. This is typical, I think. But, in my humble opinion, you need to get a meeting together for a good BIP that focuses on prevention of bad behavvior, not so much consequences after it's happened. He is on an IEP meeting isn't he? I think they are dealing with him like his only problem is poor behavior.
  4. JJJ

    JJJ Active Member

    If you did not agree to this at an IEP meeting, then they are technically suspending him 50% of the day. After 10 school days of suspension, it is considered a change in placement and they must offer something more appropriate.
  5. Shari

    Shari IsItFridayYet?

    Principal met with the superintendent about it this morning. The issue was the third meltdown yesterday, that, in my humble opinion, para caused or at the very least, escalated. He apparently poked her with blunt nose scissors on her hand. I was not aware. Still, he poked her. He did not hurt her. If he wanted to hurt her, blunt nose on those things wouldn't have stopped him.

    It was my understanding that meetings about his placement were to have everyone involved. This is at least the second time. I told them that I did not agree with this idea. We had agreed on Friday to try having me shadow and work with the paras this week before trying half days, and here we were canning it after ONE afternoon that I saw a LOT to be fixed. I was then told it was half days our not go to school there. I don't think that's right, either, but I don't know enough to argue it right then and kept my mouth shut (is there no end to the frustrations!?!??!!). I did say that me, SpEd teacher, or the one para that he works well with, I think, would have made yesterday's blow up not happen, and that even if we cut him back to half days, when we bring him back to full days, unless the para problem is addressed, its going to solve nothing. We'll bring him right back into the same ring of fire. He can't learn if he's not there, and the para's sure don't learn if he's not there, or only there while he's "being good".

    They're going to a seminar in St Louis. They think maybe that will help teach them. I'm all for the seminar, but you have 7 years experience right here with a laundry list of brokens, and in my humble opinion, they just took the cop-out.

    I have not had a chance to check on the status of the advocate, but its top priority tomorrow, since I don't have to go to school tomorrow afternoon. Thankfully grandma wil pick him up.

    Heck, they wouldn't even give me a time frame. They fully expect his mornings to be great. So they said "maybe a month, maybe 2 weeks, heck, maybe we look at it every day..." If they expect him to be great in the mornings, what are we expecting to gain from this?

    The more I talk about it, the angrier it makes me. I'm probably gonna make them bus him. That makes them keep him another 45 minutes and they have to deal with him on the bus. Ok, that's petty vindicitiveness talking, but its where I'm at right this moment. Give me an hour, and I'll be over that.