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Substance Abuse
She got fired.
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<blockquote data-quote="DaisyFace" data-source="post: 521609" data-attributes="member: 6546"><p>Kathy--</p><p></p><p>This is my thinking based upon what I've seen with my own difficult child's "employment adventures"....</p><p></p><p>I do think there is some truth to the saying that "difficult children will find each other" - I think that people who share common traits have a natural affinity for one another, even if it is only at a subconscious level. It would not surprise me in the least that your daughter's boss is a bit of a difficult child himself. Maybe that's the very reason he liked her for the job - they share at least a subconscious commonality...</p><p></p><p>BUT - because the boss is running a successful business....he has obviously gotten most of his difficult child tendencies under control - a "Functional difficult child" if you will. And other people work there and have for a long period of time, so this guy cannot be totally loony-tunes.</p><p></p><p>We DO know that the DOL telephoned on behalf of the previous receptionist - but we don't know why. It could be she complained that he shorted her last paycheck (like what happened to our friend Star*). It could be he fired her and she went ahead and filed for unemployment and the DOL needs to verify that. It could be that he had every reason to fire her and now she is coming back with nonsense as a revenge tactic. We don't know. So the fact that the DOL called does not necessarily point to anything.</p><p></p><p>Every telephone job I have ever worked went by the "two rings" rule. You never EVER let the phone ring more than twice because you risk losing a potential customer. I think that's pretty standard. How many times did the phone ring before the boss answered that time? If he picked it up on the third ring and heard a click? Yep - I'll bet he was upset at the thought of a lost client.</p><p></p><p>And the warning not to get friendly with the stylists - what does that mean, exactly? He doesn't want the receptionist away from her desk gabbing in the back all the time? (That would be my first guess). Or perhaps he was thinking he didn't want the receptionist to be perceived as "playing favorites" by directing new clients to a particular stylist she is friendly with?</p><p></p><p>So my point is - her boss may have been overly strict, or very quirky, or maybe didn't explain things very well....BUT so far, I haven't heard anything bordering on "unfair" or "abusive"...</p><p></p><p>And I know my own difficult child would have been upset at these exact types of things. W<em>ell, what's the big deal if the phone rings three times? Who cares if I talk to a stylist - I can still hear the phone.</em></p><p><em></em></p><p><em></em>So - even if there <em>was</em> something "off" about the boss....difficult child still must have at least <em>some</em> ownership of losing the job. It is a pain to interview, hire, and train new people. Surely, there must have been some kind of actual problem for the boss not to at least give her a chance....?</p><p></p><p>We've all had cr*ppy bosses at one point or another. And this is exactly the kind of challenge that all of our difficult children must learn to meet in order to live ITRW. Parents, teachers, school districts - all tend to roll-over to accomodate a difficult child. A boss won't.</p><p></p><p></p><p>I think it would be more encouraging if your difficult child admitted to a mistake or two at work - instead the "all the boss's fault" thing makes me feel like it's just more "difficult child Stories". And that makes it really tough to know what to do next.</p><p></p><p>Applying for a new job...going to the interview - this is all a good plan. (And good luck to difficult child!)</p><p></p><p>I just worry what happens if the next boss is a "problem" too...</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DaisyFace, post: 521609, member: 6546"] Kathy-- This is my thinking based upon what I've seen with my own difficult child's "employment adventures".... I do think there is some truth to the saying that "difficult children will find each other" - I think that people who share common traits have a natural affinity for one another, even if it is only at a subconscious level. It would not surprise me in the least that your daughter's boss is a bit of a difficult child himself. Maybe that's the very reason he liked her for the job - they share at least a subconscious commonality... BUT - because the boss is running a successful business....he has obviously gotten most of his difficult child tendencies under control - a "Functional difficult child" if you will. And other people work there and have for a long period of time, so this guy cannot be totally loony-tunes. We DO know that the DOL telephoned on behalf of the previous receptionist - but we don't know why. It could be she complained that he shorted her last paycheck (like what happened to our friend Star*). It could be he fired her and she went ahead and filed for unemployment and the DOL needs to verify that. It could be that he had every reason to fire her and now she is coming back with nonsense as a revenge tactic. We don't know. So the fact that the DOL called does not necessarily point to anything. Every telephone job I have ever worked went by the "two rings" rule. You never EVER let the phone ring more than twice because you risk losing a potential customer. I think that's pretty standard. How many times did the phone ring before the boss answered that time? If he picked it up on the third ring and heard a click? Yep - I'll bet he was upset at the thought of a lost client. And the warning not to get friendly with the stylists - what does that mean, exactly? He doesn't want the receptionist away from her desk gabbing in the back all the time? (That would be my first guess). Or perhaps he was thinking he didn't want the receptionist to be perceived as "playing favorites" by directing new clients to a particular stylist she is friendly with? So my point is - her boss may have been overly strict, or very quirky, or maybe didn't explain things very well....BUT so far, I haven't heard anything bordering on "unfair" or "abusive"... And I know my own difficult child would have been upset at these exact types of things. W[I]ell, what's the big deal if the phone rings three times? Who cares if I talk to a stylist - I can still hear the phone. [/I]So - even if there [I]was[/I] something "off" about the boss....difficult child still must have at least [I]some[/I] ownership of losing the job. It is a pain to interview, hire, and train new people. Surely, there must have been some kind of actual problem for the boss not to at least give her a chance....? We've all had cr*ppy bosses at one point or another. And this is exactly the kind of challenge that all of our difficult children must learn to meet in order to live ITRW. Parents, teachers, school districts - all tend to roll-over to accomodate a difficult child. A boss won't. I think it would be more encouraging if your difficult child admitted to a mistake or two at work - instead the "all the boss's fault" thing makes me feel like it's just more "difficult child Stories". And that makes it really tough to know what to do next. Applying for a new job...going to the interview - this is all a good plan. (And good luck to difficult child!) I just worry what happens if the next boss is a "problem" too... [/QUOTE]
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