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She stole $13,000
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 704262" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>Unless the money can be replaced RIGHT NOW by a personal loan for which your girlfriend is responsible.</p><p></p><p>I agree with susiestar with everything she says. More lies only dig a deeper hole.</p><p></p><p>I am wondering if this is really a crime but a moral betrayal. If the daughter's name is on the account, either jointly or entirely, how is it a crime?</p><p></p><p>This is a betrayal of trust on several levels. The Mom who I greatly sympathize with, took community property money, behind her husband's back and secreted it away from him and from his control. (I greatly understand this because it was done in my own family and by other wives in my culture. Maybe less so now, I hope, now that women can more freely work and control their own lives, at least hypothetically.</p><p></p><p>The question is now only about accepting responsibility for culpability and restoration of trust, it is a situation of clear communication, no matter what. In this sense, I truly agree with Susiestar. But the thing is, there is a mountain of deception involved here which could be an embedded cultural and historical pattern. The girlfriend's mother is culpable too, and she knows it or she would not have concealed it. </p><p></p><p>I think you, stealing, if you are committed to this woman and to your relationship and to healing--have to take the stand, first, and to decide what you need. There are moral decisions to be made. This is not just the solution of a problem. The restoration of the money is not the real problem, it is a spider's nest of betrayals and deceptions that has culminated in a crisis. Resolving the crisis does not solve it. It is just the beginning. Stealing. You need to decide where you stand, first. And then act from it and go from there. But understand, that their may be cultural and familial patterns that your girlfriend has lived, from which she will act from. Unless the change and communication start now, instigated by you, you will be marrying into her family system. Be clear. You will be going into this hornet's nest with clear eyes. This is a blessing to you, to know now, going into it.</p><p>Thank you susiestar, for this reference. What this really is to me is a different way to live life, removing the lens of materialism, the illusion that consuming will handle anything--emotional need, sadness, discontent. And teaching is consciousness, to face who we are, what we need and where we want to go. While I have not read it, from what I understand it is a radical tool to reassess who you are by confronting compulsive behavior.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 704262, member: 18958"] Unless the money can be replaced RIGHT NOW by a personal loan for which your girlfriend is responsible. I agree with susiestar with everything she says. More lies only dig a deeper hole. I am wondering if this is really a crime but a moral betrayal. If the daughter's name is on the account, either jointly or entirely, how is it a crime? This is a betrayal of trust on several levels. The Mom who I greatly sympathize with, took community property money, behind her husband's back and secreted it away from him and from his control. (I greatly understand this because it was done in my own family and by other wives in my culture. Maybe less so now, I hope, now that women can more freely work and control their own lives, at least hypothetically. The question is now only about accepting responsibility for culpability and restoration of trust, it is a situation of clear communication, no matter what. In this sense, I truly agree with Susiestar. But the thing is, there is a mountain of deception involved here which could be an embedded cultural and historical pattern. The girlfriend's mother is culpable too, and she knows it or she would not have concealed it. I think you, stealing, if you are committed to this woman and to your relationship and to healing--have to take the stand, first, and to decide what you need. There are moral decisions to be made. This is not just the solution of a problem. The restoration of the money is not the real problem, it is a spider's nest of betrayals and deceptions that has culminated in a crisis. Resolving the crisis does not solve it. It is just the beginning. Stealing. You need to decide where you stand, first. And then act from it and go from there. But understand, that their may be cultural and familial patterns that your girlfriend has lived, from which she will act from. Unless the change and communication start now, instigated by you, you will be marrying into her family system. Be clear. You will be going into this hornet's nest with clear eyes. This is a blessing to you, to know now, going into it. Thank you susiestar, for this reference. What this really is to me is a different way to live life, removing the lens of materialism, the illusion that consuming will handle anything--emotional need, sadness, discontent. And teaching is consciousness, to face who we are, what we need and where we want to go. While I have not read it, from what I understand it is a radical tool to reassess who you are by confronting compulsive behavior. [/QUOTE]
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She stole $13,000
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