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Parent Emeritus
She will never be normal, will she?
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<blockquote data-quote="Fran" data-source="post: 327113" data-attributes="member: 3"><p>It sounds like you need a break, big time. I can say that there are periods when I felt pretty low. </p><p>The healthiest thing now is to separate from each other. She is 18. Is there any relative who would take her on for 6 months? </p><p>There are a few things I was thinking you could do if there is no one who will take her. </p><p>1) Next time she is smoking pot, call the police. They have to take her out. Don't bail her out. Everytime she lights up, call the police. </p><p></p><p>2) Check with her doctor about her medications. She may need something tweeked.</p><p></p><p>3)At some point, you may have to put all of her clothes in garbage bags and leave them on the porch. Don't let her back in. Have the locks changed. One of our past members did that. The difficult child is a functioning adult who is married and has a career. </p><p></p><p>4) Does she have any aspirations of a career? Maybe if she gets a GED she can get moving towards some sort of training.</p><p></p><p>5) Give her a one way bus ticket and a ride to bus station to her bio father's house. </p><p></p><p>6)Look for support groups of parents with difficult kids. I'm thinking parents of adolescent bipolar. There may even be a group who is for the ODD child. </p><p></p><p>7) Get help for you. Carrying that degree of bitterness will hurt you. Get therapy, get friends, get away from her. </p><p></p><p>Now, I have no experience with drugs, police or taking them away from their home so take this all with a grain of salt. It was the first things I thought of when I read through is. </p><p></p><p>Your exhaustion is obvious. You are drained physically, emotionally and spiritually. You gave her 18 yrs, if you have nothing left to give then cut her loose.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Fran, post: 327113, member: 3"] It sounds like you need a break, big time. I can say that there are periods when I felt pretty low. The healthiest thing now is to separate from each other. She is 18. Is there any relative who would take her on for 6 months? There are a few things I was thinking you could do if there is no one who will take her. 1) Next time she is smoking pot, call the police. They have to take her out. Don't bail her out. Everytime she lights up, call the police. 2) Check with her doctor about her medications. She may need something tweeked. 3)At some point, you may have to put all of her clothes in garbage bags and leave them on the porch. Don't let her back in. Have the locks changed. One of our past members did that. The difficult child is a functioning adult who is married and has a career. 4) Does she have any aspirations of a career? Maybe if she gets a GED she can get moving towards some sort of training. 5) Give her a one way bus ticket and a ride to bus station to her bio father's house. 6)Look for support groups of parents with difficult kids. I'm thinking parents of adolescent bipolar. There may even be a group who is for the ODD child. 7) Get help for you. Carrying that degree of bitterness will hurt you. Get therapy, get friends, get away from her. Now, I have no experience with drugs, police or taking them away from their home so take this all with a grain of salt. It was the first things I thought of when I read through is. Your exhaustion is obvious. You are drained physically, emotionally and spiritually. You gave her 18 yrs, if you have nothing left to give then cut her loose. [/QUOTE]
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She will never be normal, will she?
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