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She's 6 and I think a sociopath
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<blockquote data-quote="Star*" data-source="post: 378513" data-attributes="member: 4964"><p>Angelphoenix, </p><p> </p><p>Hi, Welcome to the board. Your post certainly is not anything to me that was off the charts in my sons biofathers family. Actually fairly normal day. From what little you posted about her behavior? I don't see sociopath now. However there is a great argument in the psychological field that sociopaths can be made, created and not necessarily born. Even if BOTH parents are diagnosis as sociopath/psychopaths. I say this to you with some reservation because no one ever really knows what is in the mind of a child or if their mapping can be changed. I believe it can be, and I believe it's a lot of hard work, a ton of therapy constantly, redirection, coaching, corrective diet, patience, love - and even then? The results you are looking for may or may not happen. To understand what is happening in this six year olds brain would blow your mind. Do I think you could see a change? Yes. Yes I do. Do I think she's going to be dangerous? Yes absolutely. But from her point of view and her set of coping skills she's not being manipulative, or mean or psychotic - she's doing the best she can with the skill set she has to get what she feels she needs. Once that started she built on that - and it's become in six short years what it is today. </p><p> </p><p>My ex is a true sociopath with psychopathic tendencies with borderline traits. Both of his parents had sociopathic and BI-Polar disorders. The entire side of his Fathers family and their siblings are dysfunctional - every single one. His siblings are ALL dysfunctional, non-productive members of society. All have some disorder ranging from severe to minor. None except for my x have ever gone to counseling and for him it was only to get out of jail, for more drugs or avoidance issues. When I left and took my son (then 5) my son displayed worse behaviors than you describe with your 6 year old. Way worse. He was abusive to animals as well and so out of control I slept with my door locked. I sought a counsleor that specifically dealt with sociopathic and psychopathic disorders and as lucky enough to find a man that counseled the prisioners within the prison system here. His clients included high profile serial murderers and men like that. I was told after years of counsleing that despite the men he saw he had only heard about and spoken to one other person as evil as my ex. This was my concern for my son. WOULD he turn out to be like his biofather? Would those behaviors I saw him with as a child continue into adulthood? Was he a lost person, always going to be in prison, or dead, in a gang? Was he evil? At one point I even went and got holy water - I thought he was possessed, and threw it on him thinking no one has ever lived with a child like this. I read up on the child hoods of people like Dalhmer, and men like that. I was scared to death. To know what abuse I suffered from my ex? Is to know I had just fears. The man has no soul. Why would the son? </p><p> </p><p>FFwd to now? My son is 20. He's had pretty good scrapes with this law. He has a temper - but it's controllable. He loves animals and it trustworthy with them would never harm them, has his own "daughter" a lovely Pitbull he adores. He rescued her. He didn't graduate school, but wants to go back to school, and has had a string of jobs - but works. He doesn't do drugs, doesn't like to drink, but tried it. Is helpful to elderly, kind, fair...just. he's a decent person. He's not a sociopath, isn't anti-social. Still has a little bit of that wild-child in him- but when he's been pulled over on his bike by an officer? He stops, is respectful. He's not failing at life. </p><p> </p><p>So my thought is about your girl? there is hope.......It is going to take a LOT of work, and by lot I mean (exhale) WOW - you have no idea. WOW.....LOTS. But she is salvagable. She is not a lost cause. You need to find the best people that KNOW what they are working with - that have a history with people who KNOW about people like her - NOT clueless people who THINK they have read about people like sociopaths. I lived with one - I lived with a killer - a no conscious manipulative, cold as ice, you just can't imagine how charming he could be and then WHAM.....choke the life out of you and beat the dog on the way out with a 2x4 laugh about it and then take your entire paycheck to go buy himself ----something trivial and then beat you because you asked why the lights hadn't been paid then leave you for a week and beat you when he got back because he took the light bill money and left you with no car, no money. Then picked up the phone, called a friend and 20 minutes later expected you to make love like nothing happened. What a ride. So glad I moved from Disney -------Your little girl? Not like that. She's just angry at the world and her brain mapping is skewed. </p><p> </p><p>Hugs for you all - </p><p>Family therapy for you all to </p><p>Individual therapy for you</p><p>Individual therapy for her - INTENSE at best for years. </p><p>Star</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Star*, post: 378513, member: 4964"] Angelphoenix, Hi, Welcome to the board. Your post certainly is not anything to me that was off the charts in my sons biofathers family. Actually fairly normal day. From what little you posted about her behavior? I don't see sociopath now. However there is a great argument in the psychological field that sociopaths can be made, created and not necessarily born. Even if BOTH parents are diagnosis as sociopath/psychopaths. I say this to you with some reservation because no one ever really knows what is in the mind of a child or if their mapping can be changed. I believe it can be, and I believe it's a lot of hard work, a ton of therapy constantly, redirection, coaching, corrective diet, patience, love - and even then? The results you are looking for may or may not happen. To understand what is happening in this six year olds brain would blow your mind. Do I think you could see a change? Yes. Yes I do. Do I think she's going to be dangerous? Yes absolutely. But from her point of view and her set of coping skills she's not being manipulative, or mean or psychotic - she's doing the best she can with the skill set she has to get what she feels she needs. Once that started she built on that - and it's become in six short years what it is today. My ex is a true sociopath with psychopathic tendencies with borderline traits. Both of his parents had sociopathic and BI-Polar disorders. The entire side of his Fathers family and their siblings are dysfunctional - every single one. His siblings are ALL dysfunctional, non-productive members of society. All have some disorder ranging from severe to minor. None except for my x have ever gone to counseling and for him it was only to get out of jail, for more drugs or avoidance issues. When I left and took my son (then 5) my son displayed worse behaviors than you describe with your 6 year old. Way worse. He was abusive to animals as well and so out of control I slept with my door locked. I sought a counsleor that specifically dealt with sociopathic and psychopathic disorders and as lucky enough to find a man that counseled the prisioners within the prison system here. His clients included high profile serial murderers and men like that. I was told after years of counsleing that despite the men he saw he had only heard about and spoken to one other person as evil as my ex. This was my concern for my son. WOULD he turn out to be like his biofather? Would those behaviors I saw him with as a child continue into adulthood? Was he a lost person, always going to be in prison, or dead, in a gang? Was he evil? At one point I even went and got holy water - I thought he was possessed, and threw it on him thinking no one has ever lived with a child like this. I read up on the child hoods of people like Dalhmer, and men like that. I was scared to death. To know what abuse I suffered from my ex? Is to know I had just fears. The man has no soul. Why would the son? FFwd to now? My son is 20. He's had pretty good scrapes with this law. He has a temper - but it's controllable. He loves animals and it trustworthy with them would never harm them, has his own "daughter" a lovely Pitbull he adores. He rescued her. He didn't graduate school, but wants to go back to school, and has had a string of jobs - but works. He doesn't do drugs, doesn't like to drink, but tried it. Is helpful to elderly, kind, fair...just. he's a decent person. He's not a sociopath, isn't anti-social. Still has a little bit of that wild-child in him- but when he's been pulled over on his bike by an officer? He stops, is respectful. He's not failing at life. So my thought is about your girl? there is hope.......It is going to take a LOT of work, and by lot I mean (exhale) WOW - you have no idea. WOW.....LOTS. But she is salvagable. She is not a lost cause. You need to find the best people that KNOW what they are working with - that have a history with people who KNOW about people like her - NOT clueless people who THINK they have read about people like sociopaths. I lived with one - I lived with a killer - a no conscious manipulative, cold as ice, you just can't imagine how charming he could be and then WHAM.....choke the life out of you and beat the dog on the way out with a 2x4 laugh about it and then take your entire paycheck to go buy himself ----something trivial and then beat you because you asked why the lights hadn't been paid then leave you for a week and beat you when he got back because he took the light bill money and left you with no car, no money. Then picked up the phone, called a friend and 20 minutes later expected you to make love like nothing happened. What a ride. So glad I moved from Disney -------Your little girl? Not like that. She's just angry at the world and her brain mapping is skewed. Hugs for you all - Family therapy for you all to Individual therapy for you Individual therapy for her - INTENSE at best for years. Star [/QUOTE]
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