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Substance Abuse
So exactly how do you let go?
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<blockquote data-quote="Tiredof33" data-source="post: 553375" data-attributes="member: 13558"><p>It is a very difficult thing to do - but if he is calling you constantly I would tell him I am busy! Stay busy, find a hobby, exercise, meditate, read self help books, post on this forum, and learn to detatch from him as much as you can. At almost 25 he is not a child and they are so manipulative. </p><p></p><p>I can honestly say that all of the worrying I did only stressed me out more. It is his life, he is an adult, although like mine, he is not acting like it. You can not make him get help. Your mother is the one that let him move in so I would be too busy to listen to her very much!</p><p></p><p>You posted he is facing felony charges and he is already on probation, from experience (sadly) if it is drug related he maybe court ordered to rehab. Mine was twice. I wish I could say that he was clean and sober have that, but it would be a lie. I do believe with all my heart all therapy helps SOME. It will also give you and your mother a break.</p><p></p><p>I was at the point of wishing very much I had never had this child. He had cost so much in money, time, and stress. But, I can now look at him as a person that has taught me unconditional love. Mine start drugs and was out of control at an early age. Gifted, hated school, always in trouble, stealing from me (including giving my car keys to his friends to steal my car). My sanity started when I was transferred about 30 miles away and I left him behind.</p><p></p><p>Mine likes to post on FB that he suicidal. It's all out of our control. Not being there for him every moment when he calls out to you is not turning your back on him. He needs to learn to take care of himself, just as mine does. And you must take care of yourself.</p><p></p><p>I like this book written by a family therapist that couldn't save hers either. It's free and is a great place to start.</p><p><a href="http://www.support4change.com/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=131&Itemid=177/7/23.html" target="_blank">http://www.support4change.com/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=131&Itemid=177/7/23.html</a></p><p></p><p>(((huggs and blessings for us all)))</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Tiredof33, post: 553375, member: 13558"] It is a very difficult thing to do - but if he is calling you constantly I would tell him I am busy! Stay busy, find a hobby, exercise, meditate, read self help books, post on this forum, and learn to detatch from him as much as you can. At almost 25 he is not a child and they are so manipulative. I can honestly say that all of the worrying I did only stressed me out more. It is his life, he is an adult, although like mine, he is not acting like it. You can not make him get help. Your mother is the one that let him move in so I would be too busy to listen to her very much! You posted he is facing felony charges and he is already on probation, from experience (sadly) if it is drug related he maybe court ordered to rehab. Mine was twice. I wish I could say that he was clean and sober have that, but it would be a lie. I do believe with all my heart all therapy helps SOME. It will also give you and your mother a break. I was at the point of wishing very much I had never had this child. He had cost so much in money, time, and stress. But, I can now look at him as a person that has taught me unconditional love. Mine start drugs and was out of control at an early age. Gifted, hated school, always in trouble, stealing from me (including giving my car keys to his friends to steal my car). My sanity started when I was transferred about 30 miles away and I left him behind. Mine likes to post on FB that he suicidal. It's all out of our control. Not being there for him every moment when he calls out to you is not turning your back on him. He needs to learn to take care of himself, just as mine does. And you must take care of yourself. I like this book written by a family therapist that couldn't save hers either. It's free and is a great place to start. [URL]http://www.support4change.com/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=131&Itemid=177/7/23.html[/URL] (((huggs and blessings for us all))) [/QUOTE]
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So exactly how do you let go?
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