Got to say I have no complaints as far as Katie and family go. They help without being asked, offer to help often, keep the kids in line as much as humanly possible (they're bored and crowded), and are trying hard for employment and getting into a shelter or some sort of housing. But man o' man! I have 4, count 'em, 4 difficult child's in the house if you don't count husband (who's currently on his best behavior) And I'm not even counting katie as she's not behaving like a difficult child. Katie's husband is a nice guy if you can get past the rough exterior, the boasting about things no one else would consider boasting about........but as I'm getting to know him better......I'm strongly suspecting much more than simple dyslexia going on. Most likely MRDD, although not severe, but enough that I'd say his "age" is about stuck at 16-17. Maybe slightly younger depending on areas of development. I suspected as much when I met him the 1st time many years ago....I'm almost positive that is what is going on after spending a week with him. Perhaps a few other issues in the mix......who knows. Do know his obsession with computers and vampires is right up there with Travis' obsession with computers and star trek. lol Travis is more mature than Katie's husband. Much. But do see that he loves Katie, his love his kids. He's trying hard to be a good parent, even if there are moments when he acts more childlike than they do. Shelter situation is still iffy at best, they're still waiting on spot. Did get a bit of good news, one church is pulling resources, calling members, and going to either attempt to finance their rent in motel until the shelter spot opens or help husband and I with food and bills until a spot opens. Katie's husband spoke up after the call and said he'd rather not go to the motel......... And I had to leave the room, take a long break in my bedroom because I though OMG they're not ever going to want to leave. Then I came down later and spoke to Katie, told her if church offers the motel rent she needs to take it as living here with us may actually be hurting them for a shelter spot. I mean staying with family doesn't sound anywhere urgent as we're trying to survive in a motel ect. And our shelter will kick start the turning point for him and the housing ect. I WANT them in THERE! I swear I'm doing nothing, not one thing to make it cushy. They still don't have pillows, still are sleeping 5 to an air mattress on the floor sharing 1 micorfiber blanket. I only transport them to job, welfare, housing things period. Anywhere else like park or library they walk just like Travis does. Ok, so I'm feeding them about 100 times better than the shelter they were in. But between what the parents and kayla tells me......that wouldn't be difficult. Having grown up dirt poor in a large family is paying off in a big way. But still......it's hard, but I won't let a child go hungry, just isn't going to happen. Just makes me want to faint when they can go through 5 loaves of bread in 3 days. OMG! (last batch was aldi's at 75 cents each thank god) Same church that is going to help with rent will help with their food pantry.....we may be paying it a visit tomorrow. And the free breakfasts / lunches for Kayla and Alex starts tomorrow so that will help too. But yeah......these guys are hungry. They haven't eaten decent food in I don't know how long and it shows. Alex is always asking when the next meal is because he's afraid he isn't going to eat. Hahaha, but they went through all the bread a few days back. I have extra cash stashed for xmas. (not much) and husband asked for some to go buy more bread. I said nope. They didn't make it last knowing we're not much better off then they are, now they do without. See? Not cushy. There were roman noodles ect to eat instead. Same will happen this time. They'll get the idea. No skin off my nose.....there is little I can eat to begin with. lol Katie is big on desserts for the kids. I have a few things that can be made from scratch......cheap stuff from aldi's. When they're gone, they're gone. Already warned her I don't by snacks. They are doing really well and I am sooooo proud of them. But if they don't either get motel rent soon or a shelter spot I fear I'm going to loose my ever lovin' mind. Too many people. Too many difficult children. Not much for the kids to do. Not much for the adults to do as they aren't allowed computer access......and husband rules the tv unless the grands want to watch something. Katie and her husband can watch it once husband goes to bed. See? Not cushy. Not even 1/8th as cushy as mother in law used to make it for us.........yet her husband wants to stay here until a shelter spot opens? wth for? easy child did give him her old computer. Travis is going to replace the hard drive. But he's been told already he can't use it here. No where to put the darn thing and the internet can't handle another computer on it. But her husband is major obsessing over this computer. It's the reason he got a library card to get his "computer fix". (he has to walk 2 miles to the library) I'm going to try hard to have Travis delay replacing the hard drive if possible until they're either in a motel or a shelter or somewhere else. I feel for the guy........I go thru computer withdrawls too in a severe way. But yeah.......that's the last thing you worry about when you don't have a place to live. I feel for Katie. She's been parenting her husband, her mother, and her 3 kids for all these years with no support at all. No wonder she suffers from migraines and can't sleep. sheesh Some natural consequences from the past are also catching up to the kids. Katie can't go back to college until she pays 260.00 in fines from dropping out of 2 classes too early before she left. I'm still waiting for some point when they go to cash land for something and oops! that oh like 1 grand or so they borrowed on a payday loan they never paid bites them in the fanny. husband wants to offer to pay for the birth certificates they need. I'm being bull headed about it and refuse to let him offer. One because I told her to have ALL of them BEFORE she came. And two because it will cost at least 50.00 we really don't have. Then he was like they need to have their state ID's changed (would stop some of the issues we're having) but heck no! I'm not paying for that.......it's not cheap and guess what? They need those darn birth certificates for that. ughhhh If things don't start looking up soon I may have to relent though and do it just to get this junk started. (insert a whole bunch of swear words) Katie's bio Mom is supposed to be wiring them some money. It will be interesting to see what they chose to spend it on......... But their big fear is she's going to wire them money, then they're going to get a phone call with her saying she's in cincy and needs to be picked up. I flat out told them if she pulls a stunt like that she's going to find herself stuck in cincy. They expect it cuz evidently that's what she pulled in on them with St. Louis. And poor Kayla is either getting sick or has allergies acting up.......I'm suspecting she's allergic to the cat.....seeing signs katie is too. No fever......which is making me thing allergy. Of course I have no allergy medications for kids......and really no extra cash to go out and buy it either but I won't have a choice if she's not better by tomorrow. Other good thing is kids have started school today. When well except Alex was placed in a normal 3rd grade classroom. Now this child is barely functioning at the end of kindergarden level and tends to wander around the classroom and is overwhelmed with too many students. Yeah, by about 10am they placed him in the Special Education class where we told them he needed to be in the 1st place. sheesh But it gives the kids something to do all day and they really needed it. Makes me sad to see that both Alex and Evan are far worse than Travis. Alex is Travis all over again, just to a much more severe degree but just as sweet as Travis always was. Evan I suspect is MRDD as he's not functioning anywhere near age level.......on top of severe SIDS and pretty certain autism. He can be sweet......but I worry he may not even be at Alex's level Know what I mean?? And he has the destructive tendency and can be violent. Katie, her husband and I have spent alot of time talking. Not much else to do when you can't watch tv or user the computer. lol Seems loosing the baby near term a few years ago (the one before Evan) was a wake up call as far as their parenting........ran it home to them that even a child can suddenly be taken from you. Sad that it took that. But I do say I am amazed at the vast difference in Katie's parenting this time. She is active, she is on top of discipline, she is affectionate, she makes certain they're clean, fed ect. All things she did NOT do last time around. And unlike last time.......a headache, even a migraine....does not stop her from caring for the kids, even if her husband does help. I am impressed. Her parenting is up there with easy child's and Nichole's now. Only bad thing I see is she worries herself right into a migraine. I told her to let it go. Just do what she is supposed to do, what she needs to do, and let the rest go. It will happen when it happens, worrying and fretting until you make yourself sick is not going to make it happen faster. Also noticed as I've had her out and about she still stands in what I call "victim" posture. Told her this afternoon I don't ever want to see her standing like that again. I want her head held high and her back straight and her to look them in the eye. She has done nothing to be ashamed of, she is doing all she can for her family. We'll probably have to work on this as it's been an issue since childhood. On a happy note: Darrin and Alex are Bestest friends. Aubrey and Kayla are bestest friends. And sleep overs are already being planned. lmao And Evan and Brandon hit if off.......but they're a bit young for the sleep over thing. lol Saturday will be family pumpkin carving at easy child's house. easy child and Nichole are discussing getting costumes for the kids. (katie has not yet been told this) With a halloween "party" type thingie following. easy child even bought cute party favors. She tends to go all out for this stuff. lol Kayla is still my Kayla. Alex is still my Alex. And each time I look upon their faces.....each time they hug me, kiss me......I fight back tears. They will never know what it means to their grandma to have them here again. I missed Katie terribly too...... but somehow with her being grown it was not quite the same. I'd all but raised those 2 for those 2 yrs she was here......and well it was as if someone had ripped my own kids from me. But even with all of that.................This is as hard as I knew it would be. Four difficult children is nearly putting me over the top, even with them trying to be on best behavior. Nana needed a 5 hr break today and went up to "nap".......I did nap.....but no way was it 5 hrs worth. lol It's awful when you look forward to going to sit for other grandchildren to escape the crowdedness and sometimes chaos....or picking Travis up from school.......or going food shopping or doctor appoint. I'm almost always exhausted. (it's not helping I can't eat much I've lost like 30 lbs at least) husband scared me he was close to stroking last night.......which says alot because I rarely pay attention to husband's complains due to his habit of faking.........he was NOT faking. Got to call my doctor in the morning and see how expensive it will be to get the man seen, he needs his b/p medications terribly. It's awful but I keep fantasizing that once I get my state boards passed and some on the job experience that I'll do my dream and move out to the rez and work in their clinics. Far far from all family and their crisis'. Yeah.......right. But I can dream.