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So Sick of difficult child's Dumb Koi...
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 390047" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>"You washed it all by hand? Bring it to me so I can double-check that they are clean enough. Hand-washing is not as effective."</p><p></p><p>As for her wanting to change her school program, I would agree to signing off ONLY AFTER she meets with the various school staff (including counsellor) and can convince the counsellor that this is a good choice. Also needing to be built into this (with cooperation of the counsellor) should be follow-up meetings where difficult child has to justify the change in program and demonstrate that she has been able to do better as a result of the change.</p><p></p><p>You still have leverage. Don't let her bamboozle you. As for sugary treats - lock them all up, allow none for anybody. If they want to know why - ask difficult child. After a party, get leftovers out of the house to a neighbour's. Then lock up all money because she WILL spend every cent she can find on rubbish. We went through this with easy child. Any snacks we bought got stolen within days and easy child would never own up, so I stopped buying it for anyone. The others got resentful but knew better than to blame me; they knew where the blame lay and this added the right kind of pressure to easy child, she knew she was the reason even though she nagged me to go back to buying it all. I just had to learn to not buy into the nagging. At times I would even turn to the nagger and say, "Why do you think nagging will work on me? Does it work for you at other times? I must be losing my touch... if it ever worked before, then I am more vigilant now."</p><p></p><p>Hang in there, Daisy. She will learn the hard way in years to come, what she refuses to learn now.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 390047, member: 1991"] "You washed it all by hand? Bring it to me so I can double-check that they are clean enough. Hand-washing is not as effective." As for her wanting to change her school program, I would agree to signing off ONLY AFTER she meets with the various school staff (including counsellor) and can convince the counsellor that this is a good choice. Also needing to be built into this (with cooperation of the counsellor) should be follow-up meetings where difficult child has to justify the change in program and demonstrate that she has been able to do better as a result of the change. You still have leverage. Don't let her bamboozle you. As for sugary treats - lock them all up, allow none for anybody. If they want to know why - ask difficult child. After a party, get leftovers out of the house to a neighbour's. Then lock up all money because she WILL spend every cent she can find on rubbish. We went through this with easy child. Any snacks we bought got stolen within days and easy child would never own up, so I stopped buying it for anyone. The others got resentful but knew better than to blame me; they knew where the blame lay and this added the right kind of pressure to easy child, she knew she was the reason even though she nagged me to go back to buying it all. I just had to learn to not buy into the nagging. At times I would even turn to the nagger and say, "Why do you think nagging will work on me? Does it work for you at other times? I must be losing my touch... if it ever worked before, then I am more vigilant now." Hang in there, Daisy. She will learn the hard way in years to come, what she refuses to learn now. Marg [/QUOTE]
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